The Epic Jellicle Snowball War
by SirPrickles
Summary: Jemima discovers that queens aren't allowed to play in the Annual Jellicle Snowball Fight, and in her quest for justice, accidentally starts a Snowball War. Crazy antics, romantic tension, and snowballs take over the Jellicle junkyard! Rated T.
1. The Blatant Unfairness of It All

"It's not fair!" Etcetera wailed.

Even Victoria nodded; sweet Victoria who avoided conflict any chance she had. She put a supportive arm around her sister.

Plato responded, in a tone that was part exasperated, part smug, and part guilty:

"It's tradition. Only toms get to join in the annual Snowball War. Munk told me."

Jemima piped in, feistily: "I can hardly believe that! Surely the queens above us have played?"

Pouncival shook his head solemnly.

"Surely they're protested this?"

"Mac told Demeter 'No' and she did whatever Mac said back in those days, and Bomba was going all crazy about it until she found out Tugger would be sitting out. Then," Pounce continued with a smirk, "she decided it wasn't that big of a deal, really."

Electra spat, "Well, that's one great big step forward for females."

Tumblebrutus put in, "Bit of a step backwards, I would think."

Electra gave him a withering look. "Sarcasm, Tumble."

He shrank a few inches.

"Anyways," Plato said loudly, exasperation taking over, "there's no way around it. Boys only."

"Unfair!" Etcetera wailed. Her bubbly holiday spirit was crushed. All was not right in the world if she didn't get to throw snowballs. "We want to play!"

Pounce patted her shoulder. "It's for your own benefit. Things are rough out there-Admetus broke some ribs last year. We," he gestured to himself, Tumble, and Plato, "only get to play 'cause we're big now. Think about it. If Munkustrap or Alonzo hit one of you sweet little queens-" his look passed significantly over Jemima, Electra, Victoria, and Etcetera-"we'd be scraping you out of the snow."

Jemima flushed especially at this comment.

"But Plato," she insisted, "girls can compensate in other ways! We can be sneaky, or smarter-"

"Or hide!" Victoria chimed in, because her brilliant white coat was nearly indistinguishable in the snow. She gazed at Plato as if this was the solution to all their problems.

Plato shifted uncomfortably. Letting down Victoria was like telling a kitten that milk was secretly made of blanched beets. Crushing.

"Sorry, girls," he said (the first time in the whole discussion),"but Munk told me so." He turned abruptly and strode away. Pounce took his paw from Etcetera's shoulder, where it had been gently patting the whole time, and followed. Tumble hesitated, looking very guilty. But he too followed Plato.

Etcetera pouted. Electra sighed, "We're brand new queens, and what do we get? No snowball fight, I'll tell you that much."

"C'mon," Jemima said, shaking a light dusting of snow from her fur and striding with purpose towards main gathering area of the Jellicle junkyard, "Let's talk to Munkustrap ourselves. Plead our case. He's not a jerk. He might let us play."

"Alonzo won't," Etcetera said with certainty. "Or Plato. Or even Pounce. And I thought they were our friends! I mean, we've had playfights, and snowfights, since we were all kittens!"

Electra bit her lip. "They do have a point."

Victoria asked, "And what's that?"

"Since they became full-grown toms, like Rumpus and Mistoffelees..." she looked sheepish. "They are a lot bigger than us."

Jemima sighed dramatically. "Enough about that."

Victoria furrowed her brow. "They do play awful rough...Pounce nearly crushed Etcy the other day, and he's the smallest one." Her steps grew decidedly slower.

Etcetera shrugged it off. "I should have dodged. That's why we should play! We're a lot quicker than they are!"

"Up here?" Electra tapped her head. "Yes. As for the rest of it-" she gave a significant glance to the other queens, from head to tail. "Not really."

"But-" Jemima said, still marching, "Demeter is the fastest cat."

"Queen. Not cat. Tugger (if he had the inclination) could run laps around her."

"That's kind of unfair," Victoria said. "To be the biggest and the fastest?"

Etcetera giggled. "Well, he is awesome."

"Electra, whose side are you on?" Jemima asked in exasperation. She stopped dead and turned to face her adopted sister.

Electra sighed. "I don't mean to be down on you. I want to play, too. But before I was a Jellicle-" Everyone knew Electra had been a stray who grew up on the streets-"that was the law of the streets. You didn't get into it with males."

Jemima nodded slowly. "That must be why Demeter is so fast."

"I assume so."

Jemima pounded her paw with a fist. "Damnit, that's why have to play!"

The other queens were a little shocked to hear dirty language from sweet little Jemima. But their ears perked up in interest.

"Electra survived the streets! So did Demeter-and Bombalurina! We are plenty capable of fighting, and winning. Snowball fight, or the game of life itself! We are queens, and we can do anything toms can do. Probably better."

Etcy clapped enthusiastically. Even Electra was convinced. "You're right. We'll throw clumps of frozen water-and-dust-and-pollutants at the boys because we can!"

Jemima beamed. "What are we waiting for? Let's hurry and talk to Munk! They're almost starting!"

"If Munk doesn't listen, you can always bat your big beautiful brown eyes at Alonzo, and he might let us play!"

Jemima whirled around, but Victoria seemed innocently sincere. Sometimes it was hard to tell with the white queen. Jemima twitched, and looked back ahead to where they could see the tall tomcats starting to gather, full of laughter and good spirits. She picked out the black coat of Mr. Mistoffelees, the darkest thing in the junkyard come winter. She took a deep breath. "Let's go to war."


	2. Declaration of War

Munkustrap was laughing heartily at something Alonzo said. Alonzo smiled evilly. "What? I'm just saying. There's no party that good ol' Rumpus Cat can't make better-"

"Munkustrap!" came Jemima's lilting voice, sounding as though she was trying very hard to be stern and commanding. Munk looked around, and then down. She was standing right in front of him, paws on her hips, looking quite tiny in the center of a bunch of curious toms.

The big gray tabby sighed. "No, Jemima."

"You don't even know what-"

"No, the queens can't participate in the Snowball War. It's tradition, and for good reason." He glanced down at her significantly.

Jemima barely came up to his chest. She was rather lucky to have cleared his waist. Jemima turned a bright pink, but kept her voice even.

"We want to play. We think we stand a good chance of surviving, using our other resources." Behind her, Etcetera nodded fervently, and Victoria and Electra stood silently.

"Other resources?" Alonzo stepped up next to Munk. "Your pretty faces, you mean? Your sweet little tails?" That got a laugh from the group of toms.

Electra scowled. Victoria looked abashed. Jemima forced herself to meet his arrogant gaze. "We're smart, and pretty fast. We can use strategy."

Alonzo snickered, and Munkustrap, smiling slightly, shook his head. "I'm sorry, Queens. You can't play."

"Why ever not?" came the clear voice of Demeter. She was sitting atop the oven with Bombalurina, watching the exchange.

Munk laughed. "Be serious, Dem."

Demeter smiled. "I am serious. Go on, let them play."

"They can't play."

"Why not?" The smile dissolved from Demeter's face.

Munkustrap looked as if he had been struck dumb. "Well...because...tradition."

"_Tradition_?" Bomba asked archly. Her unspoken statement was something to the effect of, "how old-fashioned and egregiously unfair and that's not going to fly with us."

Munk blinked. "Because...size." Alonzo nodded, eyes narrowed.

Demeter's own light green eyes were cool. "So size is the only indication of ability? Of toughness?"

Jemima could hardly believe this. She saw Electra grinning widely beside her, and Etcy suppressed a giggle.

Munkustrap's good humor was completely gone. He looked as if he'd rather be snuggled by a sticky, two-year-old human than have this discussion with Demeter. "Dem, you're okay with this. You and Bomba sat out last year."

Bomba scowled. "Tugger told me he wasn't playing! Then he did! It was a trick!"

Demeter's eyes were so cold Jemima felt afraid, even though they weren't boring into her. She almost felt sorry for Munkustrap, who, as far as anyone knew, never had fights with Demeter.

"I sat out," Demeter said, not loudly, but the whole junkyard was silent, listening intently, "because Macavity told me to. I didn't argue with him...for obvious reasons. But you, Munk? Would you make me sit out?"

Munk looked torn. "Dem," he pleaded, "it's not safe. You could get hurt."

"That," Demeter said, with finality, "is exactly what Macavity said. You, just like your brother, seem to believe that I'm..." she pulled away from Bomba. "Weak."

There was a loaded silence in the junkyard. Munk was as still as a stone. Alonzo glared at Demeter.

"Oh, let them play."

The Rum Tum Tugger leaned heavily on Mistoffelees' head. His tone was careless. "Who doesn't want to tackle a few queens?" He leered at Bombalurina and, by proxy, Demeter. And Cassandra.

Misto, freeing himself, muttered, "Just one more reason queens shouldn't play."

Jemima, standing close, heard this. She was hurt. She thought Mistoffelees, of all cats, the sweetest, most sensitive tom, would be on their side.

In fact, she had been certain of it. Jemima looked at Misto, who, like most of the other toms, was frowning at Demeter. Maybe she didn't know him as well as she thought.

Alonzo stepped in, freeing Munkustrap from answering. "The rest of us don't want to play with queens. We can't go as hard."

Bomba: "Then why is Rumpleteazer standing in your group?"

Alonzo looked over, and said calmly: "That's Mungojerrie."

"No, I'm pretty sure it's Rumpleteazer." Bomba crossed her arms. "Mungojerrie's the one standing next to her."

Alonzo breezed, "I don't see it."

"Wait-you let Rumpleteazer play?" Jemima said, hotly.

The little orange-and-white tabby whistled and twiddled her thumbs, nonchalantly slipping behind Mungojerrie.

Munk and Alonzo both started to speak, and stopped. They shared a look.

Cassandra called out, "If you let her play, you have to let all girls play."

Alonzo said cuttingly: "She isn't a girl."

Teazer looked outraged. She puckered her lips and glared at the back of the black-and-white tomcat. Jerrie whispered something in her ear, and she nodded, contemplating.

Bomba slid off the oven to join Cassandra by a large pile of tires. "Let them play!"

"There's no way!" Alonzo snarled. He looked around. "How many of you toms want to play with the queens?"

"I like playing with queens," Tugger grinned. Bomba looked at him sourly.

"Queens are good for dancing. Not for fighting," Alonzo retorted.

Cassandra said sharply, "Don't be an ass, Lonz. I hate it when you're an ass."

He hissed. "Don't start with me, Cassandra."

"Oh, go on," Bomba said. She focused in on Tugger. "Let's get it all out there. And settle it like real cats. Snowball war."

"Snowball war," Cassandra echoed.

Demeter called, from her seat on the oven. "Well then. Munkustrap, we declare a snowball war. Toms versus queens."

Munk's mouth opened and closed a few times before he spoke. "Dem..."

"Terms," she continued calmly, "nothing less than total surrender. Prisoners allowed. Safe zones: Jelly and Jenny's dens. And don't go _easy_ on us."

Mungojerrie pushed forward. "Fine, but we get Rumpleteazer! We're a matched set, we are!"

Bombalurina stepped into the circle of toms, which parted for her like the Red Sea. She put her arm around Jemima and guided the little queen away from Munkustrap and Alonzo, with Victoria, Electra, and Etcetera following happily. She turned back to look at Munkustrap. "That makes the teams uneven."

"Here's an idea," Alonzo said, a smile twitching. "We'll give you Coricopat. He and Tantomile are linked psychically-that would be unfair."

Munk nodded slowly, still processing the situation. "Coricopat. Yes."

Coricopat was clearly outraged. His normally sleek hair was rankled. "WHAT?"

Tanto latched on to his arm. Her jaw tightened in concentration. They were clearly having a non-verbal discussion; Tanto trying desperately to calm her twin brother down. It didn't help matters when Rumpleteazer stuck out her tongue and waggled her fingers at him.

"Fine," Cori huffed. "Fine. I'm on the queen's team. And it is on." He pointed at Rumpleteazer. "It is so on-you are all going to come crawling, like a bunch of _girls_!"

Tanto smacked his head.

Etcetera proclaimed, jumping with excitement, "Let the war begin!"


	3. Strategizing

"Shut up, Pounce," Plato said, irritably. Pounce stuck out his tongue but, thinking better of it, sucked his tongue back in and tossed his head loftily, like he'd seen Alonzo do countless times. Using Alonzo tactics usually worked on Plato, who had been more unbearable than ever since the Queen's Declaration of Snowball War earlier that day. Pounce couldn't account for the moodiness of his friend. He figured it had to do with Victoria, though...most of Plato's recent mood swings had to do with Victoria.

Personally, Pounce was looking forward to getting into it with the queens, and wasn't sure why the other toms weren't taking this as the blessing it was-a chance to tackle the lovely queens with their consent.

"I call Bomba," he said grandly.

Alonzo looked at him sharply. "What?"

Pounce shrugged. "I figured we could do tom-on-queen offense. Y'know, plan our targets. And I want Bombalurina, please."

Alonzo's mismatched eyebrows raised. "No. I'll take her."

Munkustrap, who had been staring out of the doorway of Jellyorum's den where all the toms were gathered to strategize, suddenly turned around. "Actually, if we do match-up offense, I was hoping to get Bomba..."

Alonzo's eyebrows hiked further up his face. Rumpleteazer frowned, twitched her nose, and asked, "Why does everyone wanna get her? What's she done to all of you?"

Munk sighed and paced. "Well, she's the largest. Least likely to be hurt."

"And the nicest to land on!" Pounce exclaimed. Plato gave him a hearty smack after seeing the expression on Alonzo's face.

"Face it," Mungojerrie said gravely, "No tom wants to compete against his own mate! That's a lose-lose situation." Teazer made a face suggesting she didn't agree with this theory, which was mirrored in the faces of a few other young toms. "I don't know if I could do that to Tantomile..."

"I can handle Cassandra!" Alonzo's tail twitched wildly, smacking Admetus on the arm.

Pounce rubbed his head. "Then I totally claim Jemima!"

* * *

"Obviously, it would be a mistake to go one-on-one against the toms." Demeter scratched her forearm thoughtfully. "They have a size advantage."

Cassandra sneezed.

Coricopat looked at her disdainfully. Tantomile nudged him, thinking "_Be Polite!_"

"Obviously," Bomba nodded. "We need zone defense, and traps."

Cassandra sneezed again. "Sorry," she sniffled. "Cold weather and I, we don't get along."

"You can go home," Demeter said, soothingly. "We'll be fine without you."

Cassandra gave a laugh. "I know I'm not terribly useful, what with being black and visible in the snow. But since Exotica is missing, as usual, we are at a numbers disadvantage."

Demeter sighed at the truth of the Abyssinian's statement. Electra looked glum.

"Besides," Cassandra added, rubbing her nose furiously, "I have a bone to pick with Alonzo. That tom is-" she trailed off in a hiss.

Bombalurina smiled suddenly and rose up from her position lounging on Jennyanydots' quilt collection. "I have an idea. Alonzo knows you have a cold, yes?"

Cassandra looked rather deflated. "You're right," she whispered. "I'll give away our position!"

"No!" Demeter exclaimed, catching Bomba's glimmering eye, "you'll lead him right to us."

Jemima clapped her paws. Electra nuzzled her excitedly.

Demeter continued strongly: "With all three of us, he won't stand a chance. Ambush, and snowball him into oblivion!"

"Zone defense," Bomba smirked. "They'll never expect it."

Demeter grinned at her sister. "I'll bet they expect to take us, one by one!"

"We won't fall for that!" Jemima said, heartily.

Etcetera looked rather crushed. She said, hopefully, "Couldn't I take Tugger? Please? Pretty please?"

* * *

"Why Jemima?" Mistoffelees asked suspiciously, sitting in the corner of the den with Skimbleshanks.

Pounce grinned, rather naughtily. "I'm short. She's short. It's only fair."

Misto countered, "I'm short!"

"Oh?" Pounce said coolly.

"I'm short. And so _I_ claim Jemima." The glare Mistoffelees was giving Pounce seemed to suggest he didn't trust his intentions, not one little bit.

"Sound logic," the Rum Tum Tugger agreed, striding in the den and shaking snow out of his mane and onto Pouncival. "By that logic, I get Bomba." Mistoffelees shared an understanding glance with his brother.

Alonzo sneered: "You're not the biggest."

Tugger looked down at him. Alonzo amended himself. "You're not the heaviest."

Munk broke in, in a rather tortured tone of voice, "Fine! Every tom takes his own mate." Although he'd rather sit quietly next to a vacuum cleaner than go up against delicate Demeter, he could see there was no way around it.

A Snowball War was bound to be fraught with romantic tension. That was another reason, which most toms instinctively knew, that queens were better left out. Letting emotions into the playing field was a dangerous thing.

"What if we don't have mates? Yet?" Plato.

Tumble chirped: "I want Electra." Everyone gave consent.

Pounce called, again: "Victoria!" Plato glared at Pounce until he retracted, saying, "Fine, Etcetera...you big bully you."

* * *

"Er-I don't know, Etcy," Jemima said, looking cautiously at Bombalurina and trying to sense if the red queen was offended by the offer. On the contrary, Bomba grinned. Evilly.

"Yes, Etcy," she purred, "You should take Tugger. In fact, I'm going to need all four of you fan-kittens-" Jemima opened her mouth to object to the term, but shut it quickly-"to take care of him for me."

Electra's smirk was wider than ever. Etcetera bounced up and down with happiness. Jemima thought that this war was shaping up to be more fun than she'd imagined. The hostility made it, if possible, more worthwhile.

"Very well and good, you've covered Tugger and Alonzo," Cori stressed, still looking rather upset at being in a stuffy, Gumbie-cat den with a bunch of queens, "But there's a lot more than that!"

Demeter said calmly, "Take out the leaders, and the rest will come down."

"But Munkustrap is the leader." Victoria wrinkled her brow.

Demeter smiled. "I'll show myself, and he'll put himself in the back of the fray. I don't think we need to worry about him yet. Alonzo and that mangy, arrogant idiot are perfectly willing to take us out-we should return the favor."

Bomba added, "But Munk...he'll go out of his way to avoid hitting any queens."

* * *

"So." Munk nodded to Alonzo. "Take a patrol with you; do a sweep. Everyone should be out of the den by later tonight.

"But be gentle!" he yelled, as Alonzo, Plato and Pouncival disappeared eagerly out the den's doorway into the moonlit snow. "Don't hurt them! And remember, leave Demeter alone!"

* * *

"Munk." Demeter shook her head. "So...chivalrous. I admire it, I really do. But there's a time and place. And Snowball War is not the time, nor the place." She sighed, but looked rather smug: "I think I'll have to deal with him myself."

* * *

**A/N: Had to get all the tensions built up, so now the fighting can start! :D Hope everyone likes! Next update should be tomorrow night, I'm working on it...**


	4. Skirmishes

A black cat and a white cat were both silhouetted; the black cat against the snow, the white cat peering up into the night sky.

"Too easy," Plato breathed. He was crouched behind an old radiator, watching the two queens. "Pounce," he whispered, "go get Alonzo."

"I can take Cass!"

Plato hissed, "Go get Alonzo!"

Pouncival slunk away.

Turning back to the queens, Plato frowned. Victoria had ducked down into the snow. She was practically invisible. Barely, he could make out the slight shifting of her body against the white backdrop.

He concentrated so hard on keeping her in focus that he was rather startled by Alonzo's swift approach.

"Who is it?" Alonzo whispered.

"Victoria. And Cass..." Plato trailed off. Cassandra was nowhere to be seen. Bast! How could he lose a black cat in a place covered with snow?

Alonzo seemed to be thinking the same thing. He gave Plato a "seriously?" look.

"I was watching Vic!" Plato protested. "She's hard to keep track of-"

A soft sneeze shut them both up. Alonzo's ears reared up, and he grinned. "Keep watching Vic, Plato." Alonzo darted away, in the direction of the sneeze.

Plato turned his full attention to the white queen below, who appeared to be dancing in the snow. Her fur shimmered in the moonlight, back and arms arching gracefully. He let out a deep breath.

He stepped out. "Victoria."

She jumped. Her lovely blue eyes blinked rapidly, and her paws grabbing frantically for snow. She didn't have the chance to throw it, though—Plato caught her wrists neatly.

"You shouldn't be doing this."

"What? Why not?" Victoria frowned.

Plato said, "Joining the queens in this fight. It's not your fight."

Victoria pursed her lips tightly and didn't reply. Plato went on, ruffling his shoulders, "It's dangerous. Munk's right. One of you could get hurt."

She still didn't respond, but she was looking at Plato suspiciously. "Is that a threat?" she asked, finally.

He whirled around. "No! No. I won't let anyone hurt you." His eyes were full of intensity. He stepped closer.

Victoria coughed delicately and turned her face to the west, away from the large tomcat. "This is a game, Plato. I don't need you to—protect me."

"Vic…" his finger traced underneath her jaw. Victoria's eyes were wide, her breathing shallow.

A muffled shout came from behind the pile of junk surrounding the Great Tire. Then a large muffled crash, and plenty of muffled obscenities. Plato stared wildly.

Victoria darted away. "You'd better go help Alonzo," she said, disappearing into the snow.

Plato stared after her, then shook his body out and raced to the place where the "crash" had come from. He found Alonzo buried under a ten pound pile of old, caked snow. One arm, a tail, and half of his face were all that was visible.

"Don't just stare," Alonzo yelped, "help me out!"

Plato hastily jumped on the pile and started to dig, Alonzo grumbling the whole time.

"How did this happen?"

Alonzo's hair stood up on end. "Cass was—I saw her, easy, sitting over by that tottering pile of frozen junk—well, I snuck over-might've said something insulting—next thing I know, the whole pile comes down on me!"

Plato grabbed an arm and pulled. Alonzo emerged, inch by inch, swearing up a storm. "I think it was Bomba. I saw a flash of red—Ouch, Plato, my arm!"

Bright red scratches appeared. Plato grimaced. "I'm sorry." With a final heave, he freed Alonzo from the snow pile. Alonzo shook out, hissing at the pain in his head.

"Did you lose Victoria?" he demanded.

Plato groaned. "Oh, Bast…"

Alonzo poked him in the chest. "Find her. She's your responsibility. No doubt she's working as a lookout, with that white coat."

Plato nodded importantly.

Alonzo stretched out his long limbs before saying, "It wouldn't hurt to take her prisoner," and stalking away, leaving Plato standing uncertainly with the idea of taking Victoria prisoner.

* * *

"The pelting of Alonzo went out without a hitch," Jemima said, cheerily. Bomba, Demeter, and Cassandra had just returned from their mission, full of spirits. "They managed to knock the whole tower on top of him." Behind her, the triumphant queens laughed and joked, with Cassandra doing impressions of Alonzo's face when he realized the pile was coming down. "Ele, do you have…your information? From your…informer?" Her big brown eyes twinkled.

Electra reported, "They have Mistoffelees on Jem. Etcy, you've got Pounce-or he's got you."

"I'll get him!" Etcetera said brightly. She threw an imaginary snowball, face fierce with concentration.

"...Plato's got Vic-"

"No, he doesn't!"

Victoria's shrill voice startled them all.

Jemima patted her friend's shoulder. "Umm...Are you alright, Victoria?" Her heart started pumping nervously. "Would you-would you rather-do you want Misto?"

Victoria slumped. "Anyone but Plato," she muttered, staring dejectedly at a lump of frozen snow that was a peculiar shade of puce.

There was a pause.

Jemima said, carefully, "We'll stick together. That way, you won't be alone with Plato." _And I won't be alone with Misto_. Jemima suppressed a sigh.

"Who've you got, Electra?" Etcetera asked, tossing an imaginary snowball back and forth between her paws.

"Tumble," she replied shortly.

There was another pause.

"Good for you!" Jemima cheered. She really didn't know what else to say.

Electra shrugged. "Yeah. I guess." Though no one said it, they all noticed the rather awkward way this war was shaping up in regards to romantic entanglements.

Victoria seemed to be feeling it more sharply than the rest. She rested her head on Jemima's shoulder.

As Electra and Etcetera went out to defeat their respective foes, Jemima nuzzled her friend.

Victoria said quietly, "I was accosted by Plato earlier. It was very…tense."

Jemima waited. Victoria sighed in frustration. "He's acting all—like, Munkustrap-protecting-Demeter, but with an Alonzo attitude. You know what I mean?"

"I can figure, yes." Jemima scratched Victoria's side affectionately.

"Great Heavyside," Victoria muttered. She nuzzled Jem fondly. "So. What's your plan for defeating Magical Mr. Mistoffelees?"

Jemima grinned. "All in good time. Remember, we've got to take out Tugger first…"

* * *

Alonzo winced as he fingered the lump on his forehead. "I don't get it," he muttered murderously. "They shouldn't be this successful."

Munkustrap didn't respond. He was examining Admetus' purple-and-blue tail. "How did this happen?"

Admetus said, reluctantly: "Out of nowhere, Bomba and Demeter pushed a snowball down a pile, and it got bigger and bigger-I barely escaped." He picked up his tail gingerly. "I think it's broken."

Munk sighed. "Likely is."

Admetus made a face. "I just wish I could-fight back."

Munk's eyes flashed warningly, so Admetus hastily added, "I think I'll take Coricopat. I won't feel back about hitting him head-on."

Munk sat up straight. "Of course! I'd forgotten he was on the queen's team."

"I've always gotten him confused with Tantomile," Alonzo said, licking his injured arm. "Can't actually tell them apart."

"That's ridiculous!" said a new voice, thick with Cockney accent. Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer bounded into the den. Jerrie declared, "Why, Tantomile is easy to tell apart. She's so very attractive, you see. I have no trouble, none at all!"

"If it's any consolation, I can barely tell you two apart." Alonzo's tone was wry, and more than a little mocking.

Teazer's eyes narrowed. She let her gaze wander past Alonzo, with his lumpy forehead and scraped arm, to Admetus, fondling his tail protectively, ending on Munkustrap, who was peering out the den doorway restlessly.

"What's up, here? You toms ain't having much luck with the queens? That's rich! Jerrie and I just dumped a load o' snow on ol' Coricopat. Funniest thing ever."

Alonzo scowled. "Why you-"

Munkustrap, only half-listening to the bickering, the other half staring out the den's doorway, jumped. "Great Heavyside!"

Everyone turned. Alonzo bristled and leapt to Munk's side. "What is it?" he hissed. Then he gasped. "Tugger? Is that...you?"

The Rum Tum Tugger pushed past them into the den. He was soaking wet, shivering, and seemed (in the mane area, especially) to be turning into a large, glittering icicle.

He threw himself down in the corner, rubbing his paws together furiously.

Munkustrap came over to his brother. "What happened?"

"My fan-club turned on me," Tugger said darkly.

Munk groaned. "Flirting, were you?"

Tugger looked offended at the tone. "It's a tactical advantage. Normally, they can't think straight when I-"

Munk held up a paw. "Skip to the part where you got-" he paused, peering closer. A look of bewilderment crossed his face. "Sparkly?"

"They doused me with water, and then they poured a packet of 'fun, feisty' glitter on me."

Teazer looked as though it was costing her very much not to laugh.

Jerrie whistled. "They're playing dirty!"

Admetus said, wonderingly, "You've got more sparkles than Mr. Mistoffelees!" He poked Tugger's side, experimentally, and was quickly smacked away.

Tugger growled, "I know that! Bast, how am I going to get all this out? It's sticky, and half of it's frozen into icicles-" he stood, and before any of them could react, shook out his mane wildly.

"No, Tugger!" Glitter-filled ice water sprayed the room.

Alonzo wiped himself off furiously. "Don't share it!"

Teazer giggled. All the toms looked down at her. She said, "You boys are so helpless. It's cute."

"Fine. What would you suggest, Queen?" Alonzo emphasized.

"Lay a trap!" Teazer said, gaily, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

There was an awkward silence.

"Oh," said Admetus.

"Put out something nice-jewels, maybe. And just wait by till one of them picks it up!"

Alonzo's war-face was back. "Right. I've got just the thing. It's a new collar. I got it for Cassandra's birthday." He paused. Then continued, forcefully: "I'll put it right off the Great Tire. Nice and visible."

Mungojerrie nodded approval. He turned to his sister. "Teaze, do you mind terribly if I go and take care of Tantomile by meself?

Teazer rolled her shoulders. "Go on. I don't think I want to witness that." She looked about the den lazily. "I think I'll head out and drop some snowballs on Coricopat's head."

Admetus brightened. "That sounds like fun! Can I help you, Teazer?"

She gave him a grin, mischievous, as always. "Oh, come on, then."

"Well and good for you," Tugger said grumpily, picking individual specks of glitter out of his mane. "I've got some queens to tackle." He shook out once more, to the dismayed cries of Alonzo.

"Don't hurt the kittens-er-queens!" Munk urged, grabbing his brother's arm.

Tugger gave him a knowing look. "I would never 'hurt' them. Besides, it's Bombalurina I want. I'm pretty sure she put them up to it..." He pulled away. "And you should look into taking out Demeter. She is the ringleader."

Munk muttered fervently: "I'll never lay a paw on her."

"Chill, bro." Tugger leaned in. His expression was, surprisingly, understanding. "She's not going to break."


	5. Into the Fray

The junkyard was utterly silent in the light of the crescent moon; a wan light that gave more shadows than illumination. Two young queens were huddled on the side of the oven to the west of the snow-covered clearing.

Jemima dusted her head, back, and shoulders with a light coating of snow. She whispered to Victoria: "Can you still see me?"

Victoria giggled and quickly pressed a paw against her mouth.

"Oh well," Jemima said, nonchalantly, "We can't all have natural camouflage."

Victoria stiffened and grabbed her friend's arm.

A sleek black shape was moving across the yard, but paused to look over at them.

"Exotica?" Jemima called.

Exotica smiled, and crawled gracefully to where they stood in secret.

"Evening, Queens."

Jemima smiled in reply. Then she asked, curiously: "Whose side are you on?"

Exotica's heavy, slanted eyes narrowed in confusion and her smile grew. "Sides?"

"Queens versus toms. Snowball War. It was declared this afternoon."

"Oh, has that started again? I thought only toms played…"

"If the toms had their way," Jemima said, bitterly. "Alonzo and Munk refused to let us play, even though they let Rumpleteazer play! This war was declared because they're stupid. And egregiously unfair."

Exotica's eyes opened a bit more. "Oh really?"

"They wouldn't let us play," Victoria stressed. "They said we couldn't compete; 'cause they were bigger and we'd get hurt."

Exotica crossed her arms, crossly. "Oh no, they didn't!"

Jemima replied, "They so did."

The dark cat shook her head. "It's on. I was just stepping back in for another collar—on Tuesdays I'm with a different family—but that can wait." She slunk away.

"Headquarters in Jenny's den!" Jemima called after her. She caught Victoria's eye and gave a triumphant grin. "The numbers are even-ing up!"

"Is two on one very even, Ladies?"

Mistoffelees' voice echoed in the clearing. Victoria spun around, mouth open. Jemima set her own mouth tightly. Her big brown eyes raced over the familiar shadows and shapes in the junkyard jutting out of the snow, or buried in snow. Where was he?

Suddenly her brain told her: _the big black pipe_…

She didn't look. If she looked, he would know. Victoria still turned in circles, seemingly searching the sky. Jemima took a quick breath for strength, and called out sweetly:

"Using your conjuring powers is cheating, Misto."

He laughed. "I'm not." That echo. It was definitely the pipe. Jemima backed towards the pipe, in pretense of backing away from Victoria. "If you use your powers, I'll use mine."

"Which one?" he asked, amusedly. Jemima felt her cheeks flush. "Vic," she called, loudly enough so he could hear, "Check under those cross-beams by the TSE car. Under the eaves. Where Cori and Tanto hang out." Her left hind paw moved back, and she slowly bent to make a snowball. From this angle, she could turn and throw right into the drainpipe. It was a solid plan. Hopefully, Misto hadn't figured out that she knew exactly where he was.

Victoria did. "No one!" Her whisper carried urgently to Jemima. And Jemima, on a whim that transformed into an evil plan, said: "Vic, run to Jenny's den and get help. The more, the merrier." While Victoria was gone, she could lure him away and hopefully defeat him herself. "Hurry!"

Victoria nodded once, and sprang away. Jemima thought she saw her friend wink, but it could have been her imagination. While Victoria was still making her getaway, Jemima whirled and threw the snowball directly into the mouth of the drainpipe.

Her first panicked thought was that she was wrong; Mistoffelees wasn't there. But then her eyes adjusted, and she saw he was, just a little farther back than she'd estimated, but with a look of surprise and a snowball certain to hit its mark.

The soft splatter of the snowball was rather loud to her ears. Jemima grinned widely, unable to stop a bit of bravado from invading her chest. "That was my power of observation."

Misto wiped his black shoulder. "So I see…" He smiled at her impishly, and vanished.

Jemima's mouth fell open. "Cheater!"

"You started it," his voice whispered, sounding like he was right over her right shoulder. She turned her face quickly, and was rewarded with a snowball to the kisser.

He was right over her right shoulder. Jemima grabbed two pawfuls of snow and jumped on him. She had been quick, and he wasn't expecting a move like that, because she landed on him, knocking him back into the fresh snow, and buried the pawfuls in his white chest.

He gritted his teeth, and pushed her off forcefully, causing her to come down hard in the soft, newly-fallen snow. Jemima found herself buried almost a foot deep, and gasped, scrambling back out. Mistoffelees was gone.

"Misto?" Jem called lightly.

"Jemima," came a mocking echo. She turned to the pipe, but he wasn't in there. She pursed her lips. Now he was using his power in earnest.

So she sang, "Misto? Where are you…" Her voice rang through the clearing, high and full and rich.

"Using your voice?" he sounded as if he was smiling. "Hardcore cheating. You know no one can resist the power of your beautiful voice…"

"And now you're using the power of…flattery," Jemima sang, grinning and crawling slowly around, inspecting every black or white spot in her vision.

"And you're using…sarcasm," he sang back. She heard him shift, and saw him pop up high above the clearing, on the old bedsprings Tugger was rather fond of. Jemima took a deep breath and began to climb, slowly. She pulled herself up on the TSE car. "Misto…Why do you hide from me? I only want to play…"

Was it her imagination, or did she see him swallow hard, looking at her with a semi-wary, semi-relaxed expression? Was her song…working?

"Misto," she sang strongly, climbing across the wood beams that led up to the bedsprings, "Won't you stay? I want you to stay. Won't you please stay…with…me…" She was face to face with him, breathless, only a few inches away as her song died away.

Mistoffelees raised both eyebrows slightly, and smiled at her. "I'm not in a trance," he whispered. "Just so you know."

"My song didn't work?" she asked, only half-joking. Misto gave a sudden shiver. He darted past her, sliding down the beams. He stood on the top of the TSE car, hesitating. Jemima watched him in shock.

Misto looked up at her. "You win this round." His impish smile was back.

Jemima gawked. "What? But that was…that was…"

Misto bowed to her grandly, and leapt from the car, landing with a soft "crunch" in the snow. He raced away.

Jemima sat, feeling confused and slightly stupid.

"Hey," she congratulated herself, "that's one battle down." Shivering, the magic of the moment broken, she too slid back down the beam, and headed in to Jenny's den.

* * *

"Bomba's been gone awhile…" Demeter scratched her right ear in earnest. Cassandra sneezed, and said, in a nasal tone of voice because her cold was getting worse, "Id's okay. She's ah stong quween."

Jennyanydots spoke up, from the corner where she was knitting fitfully with Jellyorum. "Don't you girls think this is getting a little out of paw? Some of those toms are playing to win!"

Jelly added: "Don't provoke them too much, my dears. They are very fit. Capable of going up against Macavity." She gave a nod to Demeter and Cassandra, as it was their mates who regularly fought Macavity. Cassandra said, as coolly as she could manage, "Phat lot of good. Last tibe ooo and Jenny were da most help against Macawity."

Demeter smiled automatically at the butchering of Macavity's name. If he heard something like that, she could only imagine what he would do.

She flinched automatically as the thought came to her, the strong fear tied to the memory.

She could only imagine what he would do if she had done to him what she was now doing to Munkustrap—defying him, and going against his wishes. His orders.

Demeter clutched her head, stomach churning. Cold shivers ran from the back of her neck all the way down her tail.

Where in Heavyside was Bombalurina? She needed Bomba!

Desperately, her thoughts turned to the only other one who could hold her, comfort her, protect her…

The one she was currently at war with.

Munkustrap.

Demeter whimpered, softly. So softly, that Cassandra, now arguing with Jelly, didn't hear her.

Her nails dug into her skin, gripping tightly, and her breath grew shallow.

What would Munkustrap do to her? He was upset, she knew. By reports from Electra's "informer" he was growing more agitated. Upset. And it was all her fault…

Demeter huddled into a ball, pressing her side against the rough wall of Jennyanydot's den.

He was Macavity's brother…

Cassandra said loudly, "Whadever. We hab biz-i-ness to do." She walked over to Demeter. "Whad's wong?"

The black-and-gold queen, leader of the queens, shook herself out. She stood, slowly, supporting her back against the wall. "Worried. About Bomba."

Cassandra peered at her, deep blue eyes taking in more than the answer she was given. "Gotcha. Bud Awonzo needs a beading."

Demeter nodded briskly. She closed her eyes, as tightly as she could, for a moment. She was leader of the queens. "Right. Let's go punish Alonzo." She loped out into the midnight snow.

Cassandra put on a grin, and followed.

* * *

"Oh Etcetera…" Pounce said, softly, in the same sing-song tone Jennyanydots used, "where are you…" He was just fooling around. He knew perfectly well that she was crouched underneath the shadow of that old stroller, unable to keep still. He grinned to himself. That was Etcy for you. Bubbly, impatient, excitable.

Easy prey. And rather pretty, too.

The last thought made him grin even more. "Etcy? Come out! I just wanna play…"

A snowball hit him square in the nose. Pounce jumped back, shaking his head.

Etcetera emerged in a blur from the shadow of the stroller, another snowball already heading towards his head. He was barely able to duck.

The snowball broke crisply against a stack of old, abandoned books. Pounce, foolishly, watched it go. So it was really no surprise (except to him, maybe) that another cold, hard lump of snow plastered his mouth.

He whirled around, spitting. Etcetera wasn't there. He scanned the ground; eyes narrowed, and saw her crouched a few yards away, grinning wickedly. "What's the matter, Pounce?" she asked innocently, although the grin lent an air of menace to her challenge, "Afraid to fight a _girl_?"

He growled and picked up a clod of snow. Etcy's grin widened, and she was on her feet again in a flash, darting quickly to the left. Pounce hurled the snow. It missed the mark by less than an inch—he was accurate, but she was _fast_. Pounce felt a trickle of uncertainty run down his spine. He didn't know she could be this fast.

She giggled, her kittenish habits asserting themselves.

Pounce darted towards her. She threw a snowball that had been happily waiting behind her back. It hit him square in the kisser.

But he didn't stop. He ignored the cold, stinging sensation on his lips and tackled the pale queen, who gave a squeak of surprise. She struggled wildly, but Pounce managed to capture her wrists and pin her down firmly in the snow.

"Etcy," he said, in his normal voice, "I win."

She stopped struggling to blink up at him with wide eyes. Pounce noticed her eyes were a lighter brown than Jemima's, almost a rusty green. Like a mossy pond, subdued, but beautiful in the light. He blinked.

Etcetera's eyelids lowered. She had an odd half-smile. "I don't think so."

Before he knew it, before he could tighten his grip, she had pushed him off with a kick to the ribs. Pounce rolled away, groaning.

Etcetera hovered above him, a snowball poised pertly in her paw. "Pounce?" she said sweetly. "Would you like to surrender?"

The thought did cross his mind. But he said, fiercely, "Never!"

And the snowball was quickly shoved in his eyes. He wiped them, fuming, and heard Etcetera giggling as she danced away, eager for another round. Her enthusiasm was rather catching. He smiled smugly. This queen-kit had no idea what she was in for. Pouncival fully intended to win this battle…

* * *

Bombalurina didn't show up until the early hours of the morning.

"Bomba!" Demeter said, sounding angry. Victoria knew it was just a build-up of worry. She'd seen Demeter pace constantly throughout the night, biting her now-ragged nails and sneaking looks out the den's doorway.

"Dem, I'm fine." Bomba sounded fine. In fact, she seemed positively chipper.

Cassandra called over, "Did ooo snowball some doms? Hab ad adventure?"

Demeter looked over her sister, exasperated, but clearly relieved to find her whole and uninjured: "Yes, yes. Where were you?"

Bomba shrugged nonchalantly. "About." Victoria saw something fall from her fur. Demeter saw it too, and stooped to pick it up.

It was a fleck of-

"Glitter?" Demeter shrieked. She stared wildly at her sister.

Bomba's cheeks turned quite as red as the rest of her fur. She started ruffling her shoulder in an attempt to keep busy. More glitter fell out.

Demeter looked appalled; Cassandra, offended. They glared at the red queen.

Bomba started licking her right paw. Her face was still very flushed. "I tried to-he ambushed me-well, I did hit him with snowballs! It was a deadly game of cat-and-mouse, Dem, really. I had purely violent intentions!

"But then he tackled me, and-"

Demeter gave her famous "Bomba-if-you-value-my-sanity-you-won't-finish-that-sentence" look.

Bomba deflated, and meekly went to sit by Victoria. "How was your escapade, Vic?"

Victoria shrugged. "I'll get around to it." Plato sure would.

* * *

"Look out! Outta the way!" Munkustrap stepped back hastily as Pouncival and Plato carried in an ashen-faced Tumblebrutus, who was as limp as a dead fish.

Pounce, upon reaching the inside of the den, let go of Tumble's legs, dropping the entire weight on Plato, who stumbled but managed to hold up their unconscious friend. Pounce grabbed Munkustrap's upper arms and said, in a horrified voice, "They ambushed him! From up in a tree! We weren't even on the offensive; we were just meeting to discuss strategy! Way out of the way! I don't know how they found us!"

Plato dragged Tumble over to Jelly and Asparagus Jr's shared bed. Alonzo scooted over to make room, and then examined the splayed tom. "Ugh. That's not pretty."

"We were under a tree," Pounce's eyes darted around, remembering the incident vividly. "Plato just said something—we heard a crack, and looked up—the branch above us—Etcy and Ele—the whole branch fell—Don't think they were expecting that, Ele look shocked—but the whole thing, heavy with snow, came crashing down on us. Poor Tumble!" he choked, casting his wild gaze to where his friend lay, still a nasty grey color.

"I'll say it again," Plato growled, getting up from Tumble's side, "We have a spy. Someone's tipping them off. Alonzo got creamed. Admetus got creamed. I heard that even Misto, the Magical Mr. Mistoffelees, got creamed. And now Tumble!" He whirled and violently pounded the wall of the den, causing the frenetic Pouncival to jump.

Munkustrap pried Pounce from his shoulders and strode over to Plato. "Calm down," he ordered tersely. The tone is his voice was so steely Plato backed away, and stood, tense, beside Tumble.

Munk thought for a moment. "Teazer."

"She is a queen," Alonzo growled.

"Where is she?" Munk was furious. Tumble's condition didn't look good.

Pounce coughed. "Guys—I don't think it was Teazer. She's played with us before, and she and Jerrie are tight."

Alonzo demanded, "Who, then?"

Plato said, icily: "Whoever did this to Tumble is going to pay."

At that opportune moment, the Rum Tum Tugger stepped in. Alonzo growled, "Of course."

Munkustrap stepped between them. Alonzo bumped against him. "You've been sleeping with the enemy!" he accused.

"_Sleeping_?" Tugger cocked his head.

"Betrayer!" Alonzo yelled.

"Whoa." Tugger settled himself into a corner and stretched luxuriously. "I admit to the first charge, but take great dudgeon at the second. I'm insulted; positively offended. We didn't talk strategy—in fact, there was really no talking going on…"

Pounce looked rather envious. Alonzo pushed away from Munk and rubbed his head in disgust. "You single-minded _fiend_."

Tugger sneered his pleasure.

Munk kept a sharp eye on the two of them. He was angry and worried at this turn of events; angry at an unknown traitor, worried at the escalation the game had taken. Didn't he warn them?

Munk started to pace. Didn't he say someone would get hurt? Nevermind that he assumed it would be a queen…Demeter…

Her cold gaze flitted in his mind, unbidden, fresh and painful. He shivered. At least she was alright. But look at what she'd caused…

He continued pacing, growing more frustrated (because he had to concentrate on not stepping on Tugger or Tumble).

The younger toms watched his path intently; Pounce with worry. Tumble suddenly gasped and tried to sit up, wheezing. Plato pushed him back down with a warning look. Pounce ventured, "Um…shall we go out and continue, then?"

"Yes!" Alonzo spoke up before Munk could. "They wanted a war. Let's give them a war."

Munk grabbed his head, raking the nails through his thick headfur. His blood was racing because his heart was pounding; his heart was pounding because conflicting emotions were battling inside him. This act called for payback. It was clear the queens were serious. But he couldn't…he wouldn't…bring himself to fight then, especially Demeter.

His first regard was for her safety, her health, her happiness.

There was no way he was going to win.

But he was no coward.

"Let's go," Munkustrap said to Alonzo, who gazed at him grimly for a moment before nodding. "Plato. Stay and watch over Tumble."

Both Plato and Pounce raised their voices in protest. Plato wanted to go; Pounce wanted to stay. Munkustrap's left ear twitched, agitatedly. "Fine," he boomed. "Plato. You do as I say. No excessive force." He stared down the younger tom until Plato lowered his eyes. "Yes, Sir."

For the first time, Munkustrap stepped out into the fray.

* * *

**A/N: The "Bomba-if-you-value-my-sanity-you-won't-finish-that-sentence" look is the brainchild of clever Shrrgnien, which I stole. *nods* Hope everyone liked the next installment of "The Epic Jellicle Snowball War: Now With More Snowballs"! XD**


	6. A Little OneOnOne

Mungojerrie let out a huff of air from his tired lungs. He put both paws behind his head and flopped back against Tantomile's striped side, which was also heaving.

"Also, they've left a collar right off the Great Tire as bait," he said idly.

She breathed, "Good to know. Thanks, Jerrie."

He twisted the side of his mouth in a grin. "And I formally declare you my prisoner, Tanto."

She smiled without a care in the world and ran a nail up his arm. "No. I think you're _my_ prisoner."

"Logistics, darling," Jerry said rakishly. "I can drag you back if you put up a fuss. Easy. But you can't exactly drag me…"

Tanto leaned in, her striking face mere inches above his. "But Coricopat can," she said, sweetly.

Mungojerrie's eyes went wide, and he groaned. His paws went up in a gesture of surrender. "You minx! Has he been here the whole time?"

The psychic queen rolled out from underneath him. She stood and cast her focused gaze in the direction of a gnarled oak several yards away. Her eyes narrowed, and her tail snapped once to the right. Mungojerrie had seen it before—she was talking to Cori in her mind. Probably arguing, from the look of it…

"Tanto," he said, a note of panic creeping into his voice, "_has he been here the whole time?_"

* * *

Pouncival sat, arms wrapped tightly around his knees, tail sandwiched in between him and Tumblebrutus' sleeping form.

He sat, stiffly. He was technically guarding Jellyorum's den, their headquarters. A wretched feeling was boiling in his gut. He had checked so often on Tumble that now he was forcing himself to stare straight ahead, at the doorway of the den. It was his duty.

Tumble stirred. Pounce immediately forgot his duty, and checked his friend anxiously. Tumble's eyes were opening, slowly. He blinked a couple of times, regaining some semblance of alertness.

Pouncival scooted away, giving the wounded tom breathing room.

Tumble sat up slowly, wincing all the while. Pounce reached in to help him, but stopped, and pulled back. "Tumble. I'm so sorry."

Tumble held up a paw. "Wait. Pounce. Before you say anything, I—"he faltered, and coughed, a surprisingly loud cough that made Pounce's neck bristle.

But it seemed to cure him. Tumble pushed himself into a sitting position, and shook his head.

"No brains rattling around?" Pounce asked, attempting to be cheerful and not quite succeeding, "Good. You're back to normal."

"I feel fine. A little sore maybe, but…" he took a deep breath. "I deserve it."

Pounce shook his head. "No, Tumble. This wasn't your fault."

"Pounce…" A cold sweat broke over Tumble's face. He suddenly looked ashen and ill all over again. "I'm the spy."

Pounce jerked back. His mouth fell open. His eyes were wide, staring disbelievingly at his friend and teammate. "No!"

Tumble nodded sadly. "Yes. I told Electra—everything.

"I just," he continued apologetically, not meeting Pounce's astonished stare, "I felt sorry for them. I mean, why couldn't they play? It would have been fun. But anyways," here he blushed, going straight from ashy gray to rosy red, "Electra promised me—um—that she'd be my queenfriend—if I helped them win the Snowball War—"

"That is _it_!" Pounce yelled. He looked enraged. He glared at Tumblebrutus. "_Queenfriend_?"

"Yeah." Tumble was thoroughly sheepish. His blush was still going strong.

Pounce hissed, standing up. He started pacing the den, acting very much like Munkustrap. Tumble watched him, shoulders hunched with guilt.

"And to think," Pounce said, with a harsh, humorless laugh, "I sold us out for just one kiss…"

Tumble stood upright as if he'd been electrocuted, hair standing on end. "_What_?"

"_I'm_ the spy." Pounce stopped pacing. He looked sideways at Tumble. "Etcetera let me kiss her in exchange for my information."

Tumble groaned loudly. "Pounce…"

"Tumble!" Pounce waved a paw at him. "Calm down. We've been duped." Irritation added an edge to his voice. "It's time to get out there and get that payback Plato was talking about."

"Plato was talking about _us_, you ninny." Tumble crossed his arms. "They all want to kill us. Because _we're_ the spies!" His voice rose to a level some might call hysterical, Pounce included. "We should just defect to the queens!"

Pounce shushed him quickly. "They'll murder us even more. No, Tumble. I think we can make the best of this bad situation, here…"

His taller friend groaned. "Oh no."

"Chill. You still want Electra as a queenfriend, right?"

"Right…"

"Are you willing to risk life and limb?"

"Obviously," Tumble groaned. He looked properly resigned for the task of risking life and limb in pursuit of Electra.

Pounce slung an arm over Tumblebrutus' drooping shoulders. "There's no reason to let Electra or Etcetera know that _we_ _know_ they're playing both of us."

A gleam of light came to Tumble's eyes.

"We'll keep being their spies, making them happy with us. But we have to be careful…if Alonzo or Munkustrap finds us out…"

He mimed a throat-slitting. Tumble swallowed hard, but nodded.

"Good. Now, you stay here and rest. I'm going out to 'bargain' with Etcetera…"

* * *

Victoria sat quietly in the cold morning light, waiting. She couldn't keep putting it off. It was only a matter of time, place, and various other trifles that she couldn't manipulate forever. Jemima was off hunting for Mistoffelees, and Etcetera, Electra, and Exotica for any tom foolish enough to cross their paths. Tanto was back at Jenny's den with Mungojerrie, who had come along rather cheerfully for a captive enemy combatant.

When Victoria had left them, Jerrie was settled comfortably on Tanto's lap, whispering something that caused the usually-solemn queen to giggle like a kitten. The white queen sighed, trying in that one breath to let out all the thoughts and fears inside of her.

But the thoughts stayed…Victoria stretched her neck, letting it crackle unpleasantly. Truth was, she didn't even know what was in those thoughts. It was mostly just a jumble of emotions, all of them intense, all of them conflicting.

All of them uncertain.

She smelled him before she saw him, a hint of pine wood and musk. Victoria closed her eyes. She stood. She opened them. He was there, close enough to touch.

"Victoria..."

Plato towered over her. Victoria shook, like a leaf in the wind. Inside, her stomach churned and her heart pounded. She didn't know what she wanted, much less what to do.

The heat from his nearness was warm, pleasant even in the cold blue morning. But she couldn't stop shaking. "You-confuse me. I wish you would stop."

"Vic," he whispered, bringing his face close to hers. She saw fervor in his light green eyes.

His lips descended on hers suddenly, forcefully.

Shocked, she didn't move for a long moment. Then sense returned, and Victoria squirmed away.

"Stop it, Plato! You're not playing fair!"

"Playing?" he gave a strangled laugh. "You think this is me playing, Vic?"

"Yes," she said firmly, and turned away.

His voice was ragged. "I-I'm not-I wouldn't do that to you."

Victoria shivered. She felt him looming behind her. "This is a game, Plato," she said softly. "I just want to play."

When his paws descended on her again, she dropped to the ground and spun, flinging snow up in his face. "This is a snowball war, Plato!" she declared, grabbing a sizeable lump of packed snow and smashing it with all her might against his shocked face. "It is not supposed to be all _serious_ and full of _sexual tension_!" She ended in a shriek.

He stood still, his eyes wide, paws hanging at his sides. Victoria reached down for more snow, determined to prove that she was serious about the snowball war.

Suddenly, she was lifted into the air, Plato's arm wrapped tightly around her waist. "Fine. You want a snowball war? I'll give you a snowball war!"

Victoria's heart was beating like a scared rabbit's. "Put me down, Plato! Right now!" She pushed ineffectively at his back, and he merely shifted her weight, as though she was no heavier than tiny Jemima, and started striding towards Jellyorum's den, keeping a painfully tight grip on her knee. "Plato! Let go of me! Plato! _Plato_!"

Inside Jelly's den, the dimness blinded her, but she could make out the astonishment on Tumblebrutus' face as Plato deposited her on top of him.

"Hey, Victoria," Tumble said, looking up at Plato meekly.

"I caught her and _she stays here_."

Tumble nodded. Plato gave Victoria one last, long look. She glared back at him. He turned abruptly and left, tail twitching behind him. Victoria shook herself out in frustration, the fur all along her spine standing up.

"So," Tumble asked, "how's Electra?"

* * *

Jemima marched diligently around the western junkyard. It was the only place she hadn't checked for Mr. Mistoffelees, but she didn't really think it would yield results. The sun was shining warmly, and she didn't think he'd venture out with his black coat. Still, she had to be thorough.

"Oh! Well, I never-was-there-ever, a cat so clever as magical Mister Mistoffelees…" Her voice rang out nicely in the frosty air. Jemima grinned. Good acoustics out here in the western junkyard…

Misto's voice, as clear as day: "How am I supposed to respond to that? Jemima doesn't have her own song…"

Jemima's breath quickened. She dropped to the snowy ground, cursing her black-and-red tufted fur. Her big brown eyes took in the surroundings—the usual ice, dirt, snow-covered junk, and a random soggy paper plate—but the magical cat wasn't in sight.

"Perhaps I could…play you a tune?" He took a gigantic breath.

Jemima's heart leaped, but nothing happened to her. Misto, on the other hand, sounded as if he was struggling very hard. Jemima's ear cocked quizzically. Was he trying to…blow her away? She wasn't that small!

"Oh, forget it," he mumbled, drooping like a deflated balloon.

Jemima finally spotted him crouching in the shadow of a snowy object off to her left. She giggled, packed a snowball, and flung it.

He moved, and it hit something else in the shadowed area.

Jemima ran forward, scooping up more snow to throw. She stopped dead upon gaining visibility of the "something else" in the shadow.

"Misto…what in Heavyside are you doing with Tugger's bagpipes?"

He appeared suddenly at her side. "Well, I had this great idea for a snow cannon."

"Snow cannon?"

He nodded. "I filled it up with snow, and I was trying to get it to shoot out. Like a snowy cannonball."

Jemima's mouth fell open, and she started to laugh. Misto raised an eyebrow at her. Then raised his paw, which was holding a rather large snowball.

Jemima swallowed her laugh and backed away, but he simply reached over and patted it down affectionately on her head. Snowflakes streamed down her face, and the top of her head was plunged into frozenness.

"I win this round."

As Jemima opened her mouth to protest, he vanished. The last thing she saw was his grin, white and flashing and challenging.

Jemima shook her head out wildly. Oh, she'd rise to that challenge!

* * *

"Can't believe Tanto caught Jerrie so neatly," Electra said, casting a glance at the couple snuggling by Jenny's strictly-for-knitting chair that Pounce wasn't allowed to touch, ever. "I'll bet he just followed her back here, happy as a cat with milk and cream." There was a touch of envy in her voice.

Etcetera nodded smartly. She looked at Electra. "Ele, I'm sure he's okay."

"We knocked an entire branch on him!" Electra burst into tears. "They had to carry him away; and I haven't seen him since!"

Etcetera, startled by this outburst, flipped over. She hastily moved into her friend's side, rubbing with her shoulder. "Ele!"

The dark calico was racked with sobs. "And where is Victoria? She was supposed to be back by now…"

"I can answer that," Exotica said somberly, sliding into the den and shaking the snow from her silky coat. "She's been captured by the toms."

"What?" "No!" Electra and Etcetera's mouths gaped open in shock. "How did they even find her? She's white, for Heavyside's sake!" Electra's shrill tone caused Exotica's ears to twitch, but the dark queen answered easily enough:

"Plato caught her."

"Ah," Etcetera nodded, as if this was well and good. "Plato. Of course. He does have Victoria-sensing senses."

"Like Jemima has Misto-sensing senses!" Electra joined in the joke. But her good humor faded quickly. She asked Exotica, worriedly: "What else?"

"Demeter and Cassandra are still out tracking down Alonzo. Bomba's just…out. Jemima's on Misto."

Tantomile sat up straighter, to Jerrie's protestations. "And Coricopat?" she asked anxiously of her twin brother. Mungojerrie had the decency to look ashamed.

Exotica smiled. "I got him good. Hid myself as a snow-sculpture, and when he passed by, plastered him with snowballs. I left him buried under a pile."

There was a pause.

"Cori is on the queen's team," Etcetera said brightly.

Tanto snorted, unable to stop the wave of laughter at her brother's predicament, and leaned back into Jerrie, who nuzzled her neck with excessive passion, prompting more giggles.

Thoughtful, Exotica crawled over to Jenny's bed and settled herself in. She pressed her dark head into the pillow. "Funny. He didn't say a thing about it."


	7. It's the Sexual Tension, Actually

_Soldier's Log: Day Two of the Snowball War_

_Current Time: Evening_

Tumblebrutus licked his paw and began to scratch away with a pencil stub:

_Not much here to report. Due to injuries (Munk thinks I might have actually broken some ribs, yuck!) I'm stuck in Jelly's den, which is starting to smell a little too much like…males, come to think of it. Pungent, and cloying, and stuffy, and it stinks. There. I said it. Jelly's den stinks. And why are there random glitter flecks hiding everywhere?—a pink one got stuck to my forehead, and Teazer wouldn't stop laughing at me! _

_Apparently Electra's really worried about me. I feel great and terrible at the same time. I don't want her to feel bad, but I feel pretty good that she does. I mean, I'm flattered. Crossing my tail that it's because she cares about me and not because she feels guilty…wish I could get out of this blasted den!_

_Victoria's stuck in here too. I think I'm technically supposed to be guarding her, but what's the point if Plato won't stop staring? Or pretending to ignore her, which is dumb and fooling nobody? He's insufferable. He's already growled at me for snoring, and almost kicked me until he remembered I was wounded. I would feel sorry for Vic, but she's being a pill. Curled up in a ball and muttering things about wanting Misto just to make Plato madder, and it's totally working. I wish Pounce was here. I can't be stuck between Plato and Victoria, their negative chemistry is totally ruining my healing process! Pounce said that he thinks Plato should, "Pull his head out of his ass because it's stuck up there really far—"_

Tumble's official journal entry was interrupted by the sudden arrival of Munkustrap. He hastily shoved the little booklet under Jelly's bed.

Munkustrap let out a long, powerful breath and rolled his shoulders, leaning against the den doorway. His half-lidded eyes took in everything in the den; from Victoria tight-lipped in one corner, to Plato scowling in the opposite corner, to Rumpleteazer and Admetus enthusiastically discussing and drawing crude diagrams representing Coricopat's "attack-able zones" and snickering, to innocent Tumble, wrapped in a crude bandage and lying on Jelly's bed.

Tumble spoke up. "Any luck finding Demeter? And where's Alonzo?"

Munk shook his head. "Searched all day, not a sign. Seems she's probably hiding in Jenny's den." From the look on the Jellicle Protector's face, Tumble guessed he was rather relieved by this. "And Alonzo's off solo."

Munk dropped to all fours on the floor. Before resting, he crawled over to the moody white queen huddled in the corner a few feet from Tumble. "How are you doing?" he asked, not unkindly.

"Meh," she mumbled.

Plato's scowl grew. His claws were out, digging into his ginger headfur violently.

Tumble could see they were all headed for a confrontation. But he didn't care, because Munk was there; and if Munk was there, everything would be set right.

Surreptitiously, he slid the journal back out and continued the log entry.

_I don't think Plato's head is recoverable from his ass. Just saying. _

_

* * *

_"_A-a-a-choo!_"

Alonzo kept low to the ground. His paws made no sound, not even a whisper in the crisp snow. He moved forward stealthily, ears forward to the extreme, following the sneezing sound.

He heard her sniffle mightily, and let out a sigh. Alonzo darted quickly to the left, and pressed his back against a large muffler. He peered out, ever so slowly, taking absolutely no chances this time.

Last time he'd been lured into a trap by Cassandra's sneezing. This time he would make sure he caught her off-guard.

And make sure that it was only her.

A flash of blue in the darkness. It was her. Alonzo's eyes became mere slits as his smile grew wide with satisfaction.

Cassandra was rubbing her nose, tentatively perched on some unidentifiable snow-covered object. She paused in the act, lowering her paw as her nose twitched uncontrollably. She sneezed again, loudly.

That was enough. Alonzo dropped back down, his patched body becoming an odd bunch of black shapes as he half-way blended into the snow. He planted his hind feet firmly and coiled his back, tail stilled in anticipation.

After a beat, he jumped, flying through the air silently. Cassandra, in the act of wiping her nose, was knocked off the snow-covered object into the crisp snow blanketing the ground, ending up pinned with Alonzo looming over her.

She gasped. "Lonz!"

Alonzo kept his tight-lipped smile, eyes narrowed.

Cassandra tried, ineffectively, to squirm out from under him.

"I've missed you, Cass."

"Missed oo doo, Lonz." Her expression was a careful mix of surprise and coy innocence. Alonzo had forgotten the way her eyes shone in the moonlight. He leaned closer, resting his chest against hers and feeling the joint thumping of their hearts. Hers was beating like the wings of a trapped bird. The corner of his mouth curled up in a smile.

"How much have you missed me?"

Cassandra shrugged; as much as she could shrug held pinned against the ground. "Oh, do knohw…" She smiled seductively.

Alonzo growled. He pushed off of her; while she gasped for breath he grabbed her by the waist and lifted her up, pressing her back against that unidentifiable snow-covered object jutting out of the ground.

Her legs wrapped around him, automatically. Alonzo ran his claws down her back, causing her to hiss in mingled pain and pleasure.

After all, they were still enemies tonight.

But not always…Alonzo stopped his claws and simply held his mate, gazing into her beautiful face. He was starved for the sight of her.

Cassandra breathed heavily, gazing right back.

Alonzo tilted his chin. He leaned in…

Cassandra sneezed, explosively.

Instinctively, he flinched, and in that moment Cassandra threw off his grip. She knocked him away with a shoulder to the chest, and raced into the darkness.

Alonzo stood, thunderstruck, watching her sleek form disappear into the long shadows of the night. Slowly, he blinked. An aching sort of pain was taking over him.

"Cass," he whispered, wounded pride swallowed up by the aching, "What have I done?"

* * *

The bubbly, beautiful, pale tabby queen was sitting placidly on a stack of tires, waiting for him.

Pouncival clenched his jaw. He walked in a casual manner, flicking his tail from side to side. When he got close enough to see Etcetera's brilliant smile, he stopped.

A moment of tongue-fumbling, and Pounce said breezily, "Hey, Etcetera."

She beamed more brightly. "Hey, Pounce!"

He climbed up on the lowest tire rung. "I've got some…news for you."

She clapped. "Goody! But before we get to business, don't you think we should fight, just to make things seem right?"

"Yeah!" Pounce said, blood starting to flow much more quickly. "Do let's."

Etcetera launched herself at him. Pounce inwardly cursed as she crashed into his side, knocking him off the tire and deep into the snow with a loud "crunch".

Etcy giggled, and hopped back, circling him. Pounce pulled himself up deliberately, making a great show of yawning and stretching. In a snap he launched himself at her like a rocket. She avoided him only by falling backwards, creating a snowy "crunch" herself.

Several intense minutes later, Etcetera was panting, looking at Pouncival with an curious expression. "What's the matter, Pounce?" she asked, chest heaving, leaning lightly against the tires in an attempt to rest.

Pounce flicked his head to the side, twitching his ears to clear them of snow. He stalked towards Etcetera casually, paws at the ready.

Etcetera shrank back against the tires. "You seem…angry?" Her voice held worried uncertainty.

Pounce snickered, moving back and forth in an ever-tightening circle to where Etcetera stood. She watched him with wide eyes. He could see each individual freckle on her pretty face. He said, blithely: "It's the sexual tension, actually."

Etcetera flushed, blinking rapidly. She looked stunned, and rather bashful.

Pounce caught her around the waist, and pulled her into him. Without waiting for a sign, he kissed her soundly. She tasted sweet, like warm cream with strawberries. He pressed urgently, coaxing her lips to respond.

A light snowfall began to shower. A snowflake landed inside Pounce's ear. He broke the kiss to knock it out.

Etcetera sighed contentedly and relaxed into him, draping her arms over his shoulders. "Pouncy, I know exactly what you mean."

Pounce's eyebrows shot up, but before he could speak Etcetera was kissing him again, and he completely forgot what he was going to say.

* * *

"I am very sorry," Exotica said, speaking out of the side of her mouth to Coricopat sitting beside her, arms dangling over his knees and back hunched, staring at the wall of Jenny's den. "I had no idea you were on the queen's team."

Cori sighed.

Exotica continued, curiously: "Why didn't you tell me?"

The psychic tom suddenly turned to her. "I'll tell you the truth. Why not? Here it is: I'm don't want to be on the queen's team. In fact, when you attacked me—" Exotica looked rather ashamed of herself—"I had just been trying to get myself captured by Munkustrap, to end this misery…"

Exotica bristled. "What's so miserable about being with the queens?" she asked sharply.

"Not you!" Cori looked at her, surprised at her reaction. He gestured over to the cozy corner of the den where Mungojerrie and Tantomile were nose-to-nose. He grimaced. "Them!"

Exotica suppressed her mirth, with difficulty. Poor Cori wasn't having a very good time…

Exotica snuggled up next to him, and laid her head on his shoulder. Cori's eyebrows rose dramatically. "Tell me," Exotica purred, low and sweet, "Can you hear all the thoughts she's thinking?"

Cori sighed painfully. "If she doesn't block them; and if they're especially strong. Emotions fall under that category."

"Then," Exotica rubbed his shoulder with her head, "can she hear everything _you're_ thinking?"

"Yes," Cori whispered, uselessly.

"I really want to make it up to you…that snowballing earlier, I mean…"

"I remember it vaguely; yes…" Cori's voice drifted off.

And then only sounds in the den were Jenny's soft singing as she rocked, and Jelly's knitting needles clicking busily. Until Tantomile jerked away from Jerrie and screeched,

"Cori! _Stop that right now_!"

* * *

"I hate you," Alonzo said. The Rum Tum Tugger looked up from the daunting task of untangling his mane.

"Noted."

Alonzo: "Really, really hate you."

Munk, warningly: "Toms…"

Tugger shrugged, and continued running his claws through his mane, fiddling with the knots and bunches and trying to comb it out. "I think somebody needs a _release_…"

Alonzo snarled, and would have jumped Tugger right then and there is Munkustrap hadn't foreseen and jumped him first. Alonzo lashed out. "Lemme go!"

Munk held him down, exasperated, as the black-and-white tom kept struggling.

Tugger smirked. "You should really go _visit_ with Cassandra…"

"I hate you!" Alonzo howled.

"My, my."

"Shut up, Tugger!" Munk stated. He shook his headfur wildly. "You're making it worse!"

Tugger stood up. He stretched out, taking special care to thrust his hips in the direction of Alonzo's face. "I'm outta here. Think I'll go _keep __track_ of Bomba…"

"_HATE_!"

* * *

Sneezing filled the northern section of the junkyard, where the darkness of night provided some cover for the dark-colored queens moving in. Demeter hissed, and pulled on Cassandra, dragging her under the cover of a rusted metal sheet. She glanced around, quickly. No one seemed to have heard them…

"Bless you, bless you, bless you, bless you—"

"Bomba!"

Bombalurina ducked under the metal. "What? It's only polite." She grinned playfully at Demeter. "Are you ready for this?"

This.

Demeter took a deep breath. "This" would be the act of facing Munkustrap on the battlefield. And before last night, before her panic attack triggered by the word "Macawity," she had been eager, excited even, to pelt her loving mate with snowballs. But since the panic attack (which she had to ride out alone, thanks to Bomba's overly-passionate nature) she wasn't so sure. Since the informant reported that Munkustrap was angry, she wasn't so sure.

Demeter had never been on the receiving end of his anger. And she didn't know what to do.

"Dem!" Paws shook her, hard. "Dem. You can do this."

"Daaa," Cassandra said, trying to see if pinching her nose would help fix her voice. It didn't.

Demeter whispered, "You're certain Munk and Alonzo will be here."

Bomba nodded. "Very soon. They're scheduled to sweep this area in fifteen minutes or so."

The gold queen twitched, and dug her claws into the damp ground. "How can you be sure?"

Bomba smirked widely and gave Demeter a wink. "Tugger told me."

* * *

**A/N: *pants* Three updates in two days. *collapses in exhaustion* **


	8. What Next? Thunderstorms?

_Soldier's Log: Day Two of Snowball War_

_Current Time: Still Evening_

_O my Heavyside Bast Great Ever-lovin' Cat please let me out of this den! What did I do to deserve this? Is it because I'm the spy? Well, Pounce is too but you don't see him stuck in a smelly, stuffy Jelly-type den! He's off making time with Etcetera! Etcetera!_

_And I'm stuck here, literally the only thing between Plato and Victoria. I hate them both. _

_Why can't he just be upfront with her? Instead of being obtuse? Something like, "Victoria, I've loved you since we were kittens. Please o please be my mate. The white snowflakes dancing tenderly upon the winds of the Heavens make me think only of you, sweet, sweet Victoria". Hmm, maybe I should try something like that on Electra. But yeah, seriously. If he just 'fessed up and told her that he loves her…Plato's head is so far up his ass, I don't know how he's going to get it out. It's a shame, really. Plato used to be so cool. Stupid romantic tension. I wish they'd give into temptation already. _

_And Vic! She's still trying to play kitten when she's a queen. She's as skittish as Demeter without any reason! Just face your problems already, you gleaming white beautiful graceful lovely—_

"Tumble!"

Tumblebrutus jumped in shock at the interruption. He winced automatically as his ribs stretched and strained. His eyes darted towards Plato.

But the call hadn't come from Plato—the big tomcat was asleep, his head and shoulder leaning heavily into Jelly's den wall. His perpetual frown was greatly softened by slumber.

Tumble's attention switched to Victoria, although he could have sworn it was a male voice. But the white prisoner wasn't paying him any mind, but looking towards the den entrance where Pouncival stood, hair sticking up in all directions.

Gladly, Tumble whispered: "Pounce!" The whisper was automatic. Plato was much kinder and gentler when he was sound asleep.

Pounce took a deep breath and fluffed his fur, blinking madly several times as though trying to clear his brain.

"Umm…Pounce?"

The frazzled tom hopped over and plopped down next to Tumble. Without preamble, he asked: "Have you ever kissed a queen, Tumble?" His voice was definitely in the realm of "dreamy".

Frowning, Tumble shook his head.

Pounce didn't even seem to notice. He sighed and patted Tumble fondly on the shoulder.

Tumble knocked the paw away.

Pounce finally looked at his friend. "What's the matter?" His ears perked forward in curiosity.

"Nothing!" Tumble grumbled, remembering that Victoria was within earshot. "Just a little—bored. Stir-crazy, you might say."

Pounce wrinkled his nose. "Ugh. It smells in here."

Just as Tumble was about to reply angrily, something to the effect of "You try being trapped in here all day and night with these two crazy cats" Pounce tugged on his arm, pulling him upright.

"Let's get you some fresh air. Etcy told me Electra's _dying_ to see you alive."

"Electra?" Tumble's heart bounced happily in his chest as Pouncival led him out into the clear, refreshing night.

* * *

"Just about…there!" the orange-and-white tabby queen proclaimed, excitedly. She skipped up onto the snow-covered Great Tire and reached down behind it, pulling up a collar studded with blue stones. Dangling it from her paw, she whistled in appreciation.

Her companion, a large tom streaked liberally with brown and gray, puckered his lips. "Isn't that the collar that Alonzo left out for…oh…" Understanding filled his face. He looked at the tabby queen appraisingly. "That's pretty low."

Rumpleteazer's head jerked upright. At first she looked offended, but one glance at Admetus' rare "serious face" made her reconsider. She blinked her eyes a few times, and looked back down at the collar. She touched the stones lovingly. "Weeelllllll..." she trailed off. She clutched the collar with both paws, worriedly.

"Do you think it's too low?" Rumpleteazer asked, fingers twitching, clearly itching to go on and steal the collar but only held back by a sudden need for approval from the tom standing next to her.

Admetus opened his mouth, moving his lips a bit and shrugging his shoulders before saying: "Oh—I don't mean to—well, it's definitely a new low."

The corners of Teazer's mouth twitched a bit as she tucked the collar into her special bag. "Only to you." She patted Admetus' cheek affectionately. "'Cause you're a sweet, wholesome tom."

Admetus looked riled. He screwed up his face, pouting in a way that made Teazer bite back a laugh.

"Never mind, Admetus." Teazer looked around. "I think it's about time to—"

"Snow-bomb Coricopat, I know," Admetus recited, now looking blasé.

Teazer looked at him sideways.

"Since I'm keeping your secret, won't you tell me why you dislike Cori so much?"

Rumpleteazer's fur stood up and so did she, stretching as tall as she could to glare balefully at Admetus, who was still a head above her and still looking blasé. "What secret?"

"That you're stealing the collar Alonzo got for Cassandra."

"He left it out here!"

"So…" Admetus curled one corner of his mouth up in a smug smile. "I can tell him you took—"

Teazer clamped a paw over his mouth quickly. "No. No. Not necessary." She huffed and glanced shrewdly at Admetus. "Well," she said, finally, "When Jerrie started dating Tanto, they used to drag me and ol' Coricopat along with them. I found him 'insufferable' as he would say—" she sneered, imitating the smooth tone of voice found on Cori—"and he found me much the same. Hence, dislike. And from there, blazing hatred. Just think, we might be"—she shuddered—"In-laws…"

Admetus caught her paw and took it away from his mouth. Teazer blinked in surprise; she'd forgotten her paw was there.

Admetus looked at her for a long while. So long, the Teazer started to grow nervous. When he finally opened his mouth to respond, she found herself inordinately curious—almost nervous—as to what he would say.

"Bad date, huh?"

"Yeah!" Teazer said, relieved at his casual acceptance.

Admetus shrugged nonchalantly. He ran his nails lightly over the paw he held in his own paw. Teazer watched him, still feeling strangely anxious, though there was really no need to be anxious, was there?

"If you want a good date, I could take you out." He shrugged, still tracing lines on her palm. "After this is all over. If you want."

Rumpleteazer hadn't expected anything like this. It was out of the blue. She had never thought of Admetus in that way…well, she had never really thought of Admetus at all. He was always in the background, the chorus cat, the quiet one, who made funny faces and followed nicely whatever was asked of him.

But she found, taking in the sight in front of her of, that the idea was kind of appealing. Sure, she didn't know anything about him. But she could learn.

"You have me word," Teazer said, giving his paw a squeeze, "that if you help me snowbomb my last date, I'm at your service when this Snowball War is all over."

His goofy smile she'd seen before, but now she found that she rather liked it. A lot.

* * *

Electra watched with interest as Tantomile chewed out Coricopat. The psychic twins had a…problematic code of conduct when it came to significant others. Tanto, at the moment, was calling Cori a "pollicle brain" and accusing him of polluting her thoughts. He retorted something to the effect of "Me polluting your brain? What about my poor brain? You've got a surprisingly _dirty_ mind, Tanto!"

Mungojerrie nodded in approval at that statement. He rocked in Jenny's rocking chair, pursing his lips and looking around idly while his queenfriend and her brother bickered. Exotica crouched next to Cori, not speaking, but her tail was covertly placed around his own.

Etcetera burst into the den, panting and flushed. Electra, seeing her best friend, rolled out of Jenny's bed to come greet her. "Gee, Etcy. Lose a war?"

Etcetera caught her breath, and the first thing she did was giggle. "Nope. I won! But it was a tough one." She ambled over to Jenny's bed and plopped down, ignoring the loud drama unfolding in the corner.

Electra joined her. "Well?"

"Well?" Etcetera echoed, looking coy. "Pouncy and I had it out, that's all."

"So he's Pouncy now, is he?" Electra said, wryly.

Etcetera giggled. "Yes. And he says that Tumble is okay, but wants to see you."

"He's okay?" Electra's lip quivered. "After a giant tree branch fell on him?"

Seeing her friend dangerously close to crying again, Etcetera patted her consolingly. "It's just a few broken ribs."

"Broken ribs!" Electra whimpered.

Etcy nodded. "Munkustrap thinks so. They don't know for sure because Jelly hasn't checked 'cause she's over here with us." She paused. "Where are Jenny and Jelly?"

"They left. Went to Jenny's owners. Said Jerrie and Tanto were being too 'overt', whatever that means."

Etcetera wriggled happily and chirped, "That means—"

"_I know what it means_."

"Oh? Tell me, Electra, have you ever—"

"Cut it out, Etcy."

"Electra-and-Tumble, sittin' in a tree—"

A loud noise, like a dam breaking due to excessive water, rose over all the other noises in the Gumbie Cat's den.

"Oops! Electra! I'm so sorry I mentioned a tree! Please stop crying! Electra! _Electra_!"

* * *

Victoria was…Victoria was…

Plato's vision shifted, and the white blur in his eyes grew sharper and gained a head, two arms, two legs, and a tail. He blinked, groggy, focusing on the white queen sitting quietly on Jelly's bed, holding a small booklet in her paws, head bent over the pages.

"What are you doing?" His voice sounded rough. Too rough, he was simply coming out of his nap and didn't intend it that way.

Victoria said, not sparing him a glance, "Reading Tumble's diary." She flipped a page.

Plato shook his head slightly, rolling his shoulders and arching his back. "What?"

"Reading Tumble's diary."

Plato scowled. "You can't do that!" He pushed himself up and, in two quick motions, snatched the booklet away from her. Victoria let it go, watching him with a patient expression. Plato flipped open the booklet and read. His eyes grew wide. He looked furious, then suddenly, defeated.

The book dropped to the floor. "You read…all of it?"

Victoria said, with a hint of reproof, "There were only two entries, Plato." She gazed at him, tilting her head like a bird hearing a sound it wasn't quite sure what to do with. There was a pause. "Is it…true?" her voice was soft.

Plato flushed, and leaned back against the wall, rubbing his face in his paws. "Yes." His voice was muffled. "All of it."

Another pause.

"I'm sorry I was such an…"

"Ass?"

"Yeah." This pause was longer, but seemed more significant, as if something was growing in the meantime.

"And this thing about the snowflakes dancing tenderly?"

Plato looked up. Victoria was grinning. Plato said forcefully, "That's Tumble's bad poetry, not mine."

Victoria let out a small chuckle. "I hope he doesn't try it on Electra. But if he does, I want to see her response."

Another pause.

Plato sighed. "Let me just—say it, then. Victoria…"

"No!" She rushed over to where he sat, shaking her head. "You don't need to. I don't…I don't want you to."

He lifted his eyes slowly, his insides feeling heavy and hot and aching. But she was looking at him with compassion. And perhaps…something more?

"Tumble's right, Plato," she whispered, blue eyes flitting around somewhere in the region of his knees, looking chagrined. "I need to—I need to face my fears—"

Plato's brows narrowed in disbelief. "Are you afraid of me?"

"In a way," Victoria said, playing with her nails. "You—you see me as a queen, and I just—"she shrugged painfully, "I still feel like I'm the same little kitten inside. Deep down."

Plato's paw rested on hers gently. "I love that little kitten too, Victoria." His light green eyes were warm. "I can wait for her. Whenever she feels ready, I'm there. Even," he grimaced, "Even as just a friend, if she wants a sparkly magician…"

Victoria's smile was radiant. Plato thought it was worth it giving her up to Mistoffelees just to see her smile like this all the time.

Then, in a move that caused his hair to stand up on end, Victoria nuzzled his shoulder, purring deep in her chest. She settled herself into his side and planted a kiss on his cheek.

"Umm…Vic?" His cheeks were burning. She snuggled closer and draped her tail over leg.

"You don't need to wait too much longer, Plato."

This pause, unbroken, lasted longer than all the other pauses put together. It wasn't really a pause, and it wasn't really silent, but there weren't any words spoken.

Until Rumpleteazer crawled into the den, followed shortly by Admetus. She yelped.

"Great Heavyside! _What is going on in here_?"

* * *

"Please remind me why we're bringing him," Alonzo said, in what was meant to be a neutral tone. The neutrality was rather ruined by the look of pure loathing he shot at the back of the maned tomcat a few strides ahead.

Munkustrap groaned.

Tugger spun around, walking backwards with equal ease. "The view." He shook his shoulders, causing his mane to flap wildly.

Alonzo gritted his teeth, lowered his voice, and leaned in towards Munk's right ear. "He's the most easily spot-table cat in the entire junkyard. He's huge and fuzzy."

Munk swallowed back a retort. It wouldn't do to encourage Alonzo, who was just aching for a fight, and growing less and less discriminate as to who it was with.

Tugger whirled back around, giving Munk and Alonzo a clear view of his backside and swinging tail. And he managed to do it in a way that seemed to say, "Stuff it, Lonz."

Or maybe Munkustrap was just reading into things. He took a tight, controlled breath, and asked quietly: "You know for certain they'll be in the Northern junkyard?"

Tugger looked back over his shoulder. "Loose lips," he smirked.

Alonzo sidled next to Munk, physically pressing into his side to hiss in his ear: "Why are we trusting him? We know there's a spy!"

Munk gritted his teeth and refused to answer. The tension between them was too thick. He couldn't let himself give in to it. If he lost it…well. He didn't know precisely what would happen, but it was bound to be bad.

Really bad.

For Alonzo's sake, he didn't respond.

Alonzo growled in frustration, but kept his peace.

The three tomcats passed through the towering piles, every here and there a dull piece of junk showing through the caked snow. The night was cold, and much darker than then night before. Heavy black clouds made the sky ominous. It was certain to snow.

Munkustrap really didn't want to be out here, chilled and tense and ready to snap. To make matters worse, he was supposed to engage Demeter in some foolish snowball battle.

He hadn't even seen her for two whole days. And two whole nights…

Munk let out a sigh. He really wished Macavity was here, right now. He needed someone to rip into, to bite, to tear apart. This was Mac's fault, really. Mac had kept Demeter down. He, Munkustrap, had been nothing but loving and encouraging. And yet she had said he was just like Macavity! Because he wouldn't let tiny, delicate Jemima play in a snowball fight with toms twice her size!

Munk let out a low growl. Alonzo glanced at him sideways.

"What's wrong?"

Munk gave up. He let out a strangled laugh. "I'll tell you what's wrong. I'm out here with you two idiots, getting snowed on—"the blackened blanket of sky had started to let loose a flurry of impatient snowflakes that landed thickly on their heads and backs—"and Mac is nowhere in sight, so I can't _kill him_!"

"You mean one idiot," Alonzo said loftily.

Munkustrap snapped. He hit his second-in-command suddenly, hard right, knocking the spotted cat into the flat side of a rusty crate. "Two idiots," he snarled, inches from Alonzo's wide-eyed face.

Alonzo drew a deep breath. "Only if you mean the two of us." He gestured with a loose paw. "See where your brother's gone."

Munk looked quickly.

The Rum Tum Tugger was nowhere in sight. Snow started falling more thickly, filling the frosty air.

"I think," Alonzo said, icily, leaned closer with a sneer, "that makes one traitor. And one idiot." His light blue eyes were challenging Munkustrap's grays. "You."

* * *

**A/N: Sorry I've been late on the updating! Life's been wet and rainy lately. Thank you all for reading this far, I hope the you enjoy it! To show appreciation for everyone's feedback and support, I'm going to have a little treat for my 50th reviewer :)**


	9. It's a Mess

Thick, swollen snowflakes appeared dark gray as they fell from the midnight sky, silent and foreboding. Jemima ducked deeper under the cover of a wooden hatbox and half-open polka dot umbrella. Then she bit her lip, and scooted forward until her head was peering out, unprotected, scanning over the field of snow-covered objects and piles in the northern junkyard.

No sign of anyone. Jemima pushed back into her temporary shelter and wrapped her arms around her knees. She tucked her chin in and squeezed her eyes shut.

She felt horrid. This whole Snowball War was turning out to be a mess, and it was all her fault, really.

When she stopped back into Jenny's den a few minutes ago, she had been breathless, excited, just come from having another snow battle with Mistoffelees, a successful one that ended with a snowball of destruction gaining mass and momentum and rolling completely over the tuxedo tom, who admitted in a strained voice that the victory was hers. Jemima had been ready to share the queens' triumph with her friends, but never had the chance, because she encountered the distressing scene of Electra bawling and Etcetera fluttering around, trying to distract the calico queen with soothing comments and nuzzles. They hadn't even noticed Jemima.

A few yards away, Coricopat and Tantomile were arguing; with Tanto finally declaring (and seizing Jerrie by the paw) that it was "too crowded" for the likes of her in the den. She left in a huff, pulling Jerrie with her, who didn't seem at all put out by this turn of events and even managed to give Jemima a rakish wink.

At least he was having a good time.

Cori, usually indulgent with her, was all bristly and didn't say a word. Exotica had shrugged at Jemima, and exchanged a bit of small talk indicating that Demeter, Bombalurina and Cassandra were making a stand in the northern portion of the junkyard.

Jemima, figuring "there" had to be better than here in the den, left in a hurry.

When she finally caught up to those queens, surprising them, Demeter had jumped several feet in the air and started gazing about wildly, as if Macavity had just been spotted. Bomba told Jemima not to mind it; Dem was just a little wound up. Demeter, looking abashed, had then patted Jemima on the head and told her to run along, but to watch out for Munkustrap "who might eat you".

It was such an odd comment that Jemima almost laughed. But seeing Bombalurina's worried expression as she rubbed her sister's shoulder, Jemima felt rather frightened, instead. So to distract herself, she asked after Victoria.

And was promptly told Victoria had been captured by Plato.

Jemima sat upright, hitting her head on the pole of the umbrella. "Ouch," she said aloud, angrily knocking the pole away. It obeyed, and the hatbox, without its support, fell on top of Jemima's head, squashing her left ear painfully.

She hissed, and pushed the box off. It slid gently in the snow, unaffected. The cool flakes felt soothing to her smarting left ear. Jemima sighed, miserable.

She'd promised Victoria she wouldn't leave her alone…

A small sob pushed its way out of her throat. Jemima's nose started tingling and her eyes felt hot and tight.

And she squealed suddenly as a shower of snow landed on her head and back. Jemima jumped, woken up by the instant cold, which was so much worse than the snowflakes falling from the sky.

"Let's do three out of five."

"Misto!" Jemima gasped, shaking the snow off wildly.

Mistoffelees landed in front of her, bright brown eyes twinkling. "That's two-two, by my count."

"Misto," Jemima said. He looked at her, puzzled. "Jemima. What's wrong?"

"Everyone's taking this war too seriously." She sniffed, and wiped her nose. "I—I caused this."

Mistoffelees crawled to where she sat, and settled in beside her, staring at the snowflakes falling heavily in front of them. There was a long pause, wherein Jemima stole glances at the tuxedo cat, who simply watched the snowflakes fall. Finally he said, breathing heavily, "It's not you."

"I started it," she admitted.

He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye, and his mouth curled in a wry grin. "Still. It's not you. It's the romantic tension."

"I know, right?" Jemima blurted, indignant.

Mistoffelees nodded absently, watching the little queen cross her arms, tail twitching agitatedly.

"I mean, why can't they all be cool about it?"

Misto shrugged, leaning closer, still watching Jemima.

"Like, Plato? He's tormenting Victoria! She's so confused, and freaked out!"

Misto put a comforting paw on Jemima's leg. "Victoria's in love with him. She'll figure it out."

Jemima sighed dramatically and leaned into the black tom. "Why can't they just be friendly? Why can't they just be friends, like us?"

"Just friends?" His tone was careful.

Jemima said cheerfully, "Yeah. Just good ol' friends." She patted his shoulder affectionately.

Mistoffelees gave a slight sigh and leaned back on his arms. His tail flipped back a forth a time or two, then he got up.

As he walked away, Jemima blinked madly. "Does this mean no part five?" she called after his retreating back.

His voice was muffled by the snow, falling ever harder. "Not just yet."

Jemima wondered if it was something she'd said.

* * *

"The nerve!" Tantomile hissed.

Mungojerrie yawned. "Darlin', it's cold out. Are we headed someplace specific-like, or…?"

Tanto glanced swiftly at the orange striped tabby by her side. She gave a grudging smile. "Do you only think of creature comforts?"

"If that means food n' shelter and your fine company, then yes, yes I do."

Tanto wound both her arms around one of Jerrie's, leaning into his side and resting her head on his shoulder. He planted a kiss on top of her head. "Now then. If you have no preference—"

"Preference?" Tanto gazed up at him with admiration.

Mungojerrie winked. "I know. Sometimes I use big words."

Tanto rubbed her cheek into his chest. "You're full of surprises."

"Like…" Jerrie suddenly dipped her, wrapping both arms around her waist. Tanto giggled helplessly as he planted kisses up her neck and cheek.

"Jerrie—" but he reached her lips and stopped whatever comment she was about to make.

Blood rushed to her head as he just as suddenly pulled her back upright, breaking away. "Tanto, darlin', I've got to check something real quick by the Great Tire. Be a doll and wait here, eh?"

She nodded, still giggling.

Jerrie hurried off, warning her to "stay right there" and that he'd "be right back in a jiffy!" Tantomile, realizing after the pleasant flush wore off that it was rather cold and snowy outside in the junkyard, dropped to all fours, settling herself into a sphinx-like position to preserve heat. She tucked her head down and as a result didn't see the large snowball flying through the air, headed straight for her.

But she felt it.

The cold wet "smack" against her left side caused her to gasp, looking quickly in the direction it had come from.

Admetus was sliding down a pile of junk, another snowball packed and ready. His face was tense with concentration, and he hurled the second snowball.

Tantomile, mentally cursing her inability to notice another cat in the area if not with senses then at least with psychic vibrations, scooted away. But not quickly enough—it hit her, hard, on the shoulder. She brushed it off and got to her feet, scooping up a pawful of soft snow, packing it quickly.

Admetus was quicker. He threw again, but Tantomile was ready, and it whizzed harmlessly by her shoulder.

She was just preparing to counter-attack when a loud voice said, angrily: "What do you think you're doing?"

Mungojerrie was back. He hissed at Admetus, eyes narrowed, lips curled back in a snarl. "Nobody throws snowballs at my queen!"

Admetus stopped dead. He blinked. "Queen?—"

Jerrie tackled him, taking special care to land on Admetus' broken tail. Admetus yelped. "Jerrie! I'm sorry, I thought she was Cori—"

Jerrie pushed his face down, muffling it in the snow. Tantomile felt a flush of pleasure run through her at this display. It may have been overkill, since those snowballs hadn't really hurt her, but she liked seeing Jerrie acting so protective.

She was just thinking of ways she would show him her approval when she sensed another presence on the scene—

Rumpleteazer burst in, hitting Jerrie and knocking him off Admetus with the momentum built up in her small frame. "Jerrie! Stop! He was doing it for me!"

"Teazer?" Jerrie stared up at her. "Why did you want him to attack Tantomile?" He sounded quizzical, and rather wounded. "I thought you liked Tanto!"

Tanto, too, looked to Rumpleteazer for her answer, although she was pretty sure she knew the answer already.

Teazer pursed her lips, blowing out a breath and rolling her eyes innocently. "Not Tanto! Coricopat. It was an honest mistake on Admetus' part!"

Tanto kept a straight face, but inside she was amused. Teazer and Cori's antics never failed to give her a good laugh.

Jerrie, still flattened on the ground, smiled broadly. "Oh. That's different."

"They look alike," Admetus muttered, holding his wounded tail tenderly. Rumpleteazer crawled over to him. She took the tail and gave it a kiss.

Tanto raised an eyebrow. She caught Jerrie's wide eyes, blinking in happy confusion. Inside her mind Tanto sent him a message: _Well. It looks as if our siblings weren't meant to be together, after all…_

_

* * *

_"Does it hurt too much?"

Tumble took an experimental deep breath. His ribs did ache something awful, but the last thing he wanted to do was get sent back to Jelly's smelly den. "Nope."

Pouncival shook out his headfur, which was covered in snow. Snow also coated the rest of him, as well as all of Tumble. The dark night and the heavy snowfall had been distinctly unfriendly to them, cold and moist and oppressive.

"Whatever we do, we need to stay away from the northern junkyard. That's where Munk and Alonzo went."

Tumble nodded fervently. He still wasn't certain he'd escape this Snowball War with his life, being a spy for the queens and all. It was some comfort that Pounce was in the same situation.

Of course, Pounce seemed to have much more luck landing on his feet.

He'd proven that already with Etcetera.

Tumble shook his head, the cold flakes shimmying down to his back and shoulders. "It's really going hard, isn't it?"

"Yeah." Pounce sounded worried. He paused in his walk. "I wonder if they're outside in this weather."

Bast! Tumble cursed the weather. He felt like he'd waited too long already to see Electra. But he didn't want her to suffer from the cold or exposure, so…

He sighed. "Pounce."

Pounce looked back at him.

"I don't think they're out in this weather."

Pounce grimaced. "You're probably right." He shuffled back over to Tumble. "What now?"

Tumble shrugged, more snowflakes falling from his shoulders. "There's got to be something we can do…"

* * *

Demeter bit her nail. Again. Even though there was nothing left to take off; the excess having been excised hours before.

Cassandra shivered, rubbing her shoulders and chest. "Stoopid sdnow. I hade sdnow."

Demeter clenched her paw into a fist, and tucked it into her chest. Her ears, always alert, picked up the sound of voices down below the pile the queens were hiding behind.

Munkustrap's voice…but it sounded unusual, for him…the tone was so…_violent_…

Demeter jerked, automatically. She bit her lip. "Bomba?" she whispered, sounding to her own ears like a little frightened kitten.

Cassandra groaned loudly. "Oh dow. Nod again!"

"What do you mean?" Demeter demanded, turning to fix the Abyssinian in a green glare. Cassandra's eyes were wide, her lips tight. She looked at Demeter pointedly.

"What? Oh Great Heavyside, _where's Bomba_?"

* * *

The red queen slunk behind a corner, sliding quickly along a path already made by another pair of footprints. She moved with purpose, breath steaming in the frosty air. She halted at the edge of a small clearing, brimming with new snow.

"Alright!" she whispered urgently, speaking to a large, maned tomcat. "What is it? I have to get back to Demeter!"

"I just wanted to show you something," he said, moving back a step.

Bombalurina glared. "Seriously?"

"So seriously."

"Now? Right now?"

His lips parted in a sensual grin. "Right now."

She shook her head wildly. "No. This isn't right. I have to get back to Demeter."

He caught her easily, pulling her back into the clearing. "It'll be quick. I promise."

"No, Tugger, darnit! Let me go!"

"Really quick. Look over here."

She glared at him in exasperation. But as he wasn't releasing his hold on her, she did as he said.

It was a large patch of snow that had been mixed with an earlier puddle of mud, becoming a small, wet slushy-pond.

"It's…slush."

He leaned closer to her, bringing his striped face opposite hers, green eyes meeting brown. "That's right."

Her brown eyes grew wide. "Oh…no." Bomba squirmed mightily. "Tugger! Don't you dare!"

His grip on her tightened, and she felt all her memories of happy warm things like fires and cuddling flashing in her mind mere seconds before she was doomed to be dunked face-first in a pool of icy, muddy, slush.

"It was just _glitter_, for Heavyside's sake!"

"It was the _mane_, Bomba," he drawled, bodily lifting her off the ground. "Nobody, not even the Hidden Paw himself, messes with the mane!"

"But—you already seduced me!"

He sounded amused. "That was recreational." She wriggled more desperately. "Hush, Babe. One quick dunk, and we're even…"

Bomba squeezed her eyes shut to erase the depths of slush looming in front of her. She braced herself for the frozen shock.

It never came. Instead something crashed into Tugger's side, knocking them both over; thankfully, not into the slushy-pond. Bomba's eyes flew open.

Demeter stood towering above them, nostrils flared, legs planted, fixing Tugger with her iciest glare. "Don't you dare double cross _me_, double-crosser!"

Bomba's grin grew ridiculously wide at the look of utter astonishment on Tugger's handsome face. His mouth was open in shock and he seemed to be at a loss for words.

Demeter turned abruptly to Bomba, still glaring. She reached down and pulled her sister up, forcefully. "Come along, _Bomba_. Munkustrap still needs a lesson in what queens can and can't do."

As Bombalurina followed her little sister, she started to worry, not for Demeter, but for Munkustrap.

He would have no idea what hit him.

* * *

**A/N: Congrats to Wintra, my 50th reviewer! And thanks to everyone who's been following the story thus far. Hope you're having as much fun as I am!**


	10. Blizzard

The red queen, ducking her head down low, followed obediently in the steps of her gold-and-black leader.

She didn't dare ask her to slow down—Demeter was too worked up.

But as she caught up, breathless, she noticed a confidence in the gold queen's shoulders, where before they'd been hunched in fear.

Bombalurina took to Demeter's side with the ease of years of practice and asked, "You feeling better?"

Demeter answered, sounding a bit surprised, "You know, I actually _am_?"

Bomba gave a big smirk. "See? Once you smack Tugger he's not so bad."

A grin forced its way to Demeter's war-face. "True enough."

By the time this conversation finished both cats could see Cassandra where they'd left her, but she wasn't paying attention to their approach. The Abyssinian, who looked like a big dark blot in the snowy landscape, was crouched with her paws planted on two wooden crates and head stretched out between them, peering intensely at some scene down below.

Demeter sat in the hard snow by Cassandra. There was a bit of shelter from the pelting hail behind an anonymous pile of snow-covered stuff.

Bomba crouched at Cass's other side. "What is it?" she asked urgently at the dark queen's hiss.

Cassandra didn't even look up. "Munk's got Awonzo pinned!" She sounded angry.

"What?" Demeter jerked back up on her hind feet and leaned over Cassandra, almost comically, trying to catch a glimpse of her estranged mate.

"Tensions are high," said a familiar voice. The Rum Tum Tugger dropped to one knee in the snow by Bombalurina, his expression neutral.

Cassandra, annoyed by Demeter's anxious weight on her head and shoulders, growled and pushed upright. Demeter sat back, eyes darting from Tugger to Bombalurina and back down towards Munkustrap, barely visible through the heavy snowfall. Fright was starting to seep back into her posture.

Bomba, feeling every inch of that tension, said quickly, "Right. Cass, you and I take Alonzo-er, 'Awonzo'."

Cass didn't look remotely amused. "It's getting bedder," she complained.

"Tugs, you're with Demeter, kay?"

It was really a marvel, Demeter thought wryly, that her sister still trusted the tom who'd not one minute ago tried to dunk her in slush. Bomba was so very hopeless.

But Demeter's very exasperation was helping ease her fear, and she figured that being paired with Tugger gave her the delightful option of knocking him into a ditch should the opportunity present itself. After all, he was on the tom's team.

Tugger nodded. "You got it, Babe." Then the neutral expression broke and he whispered: "But after that I'm on you."

The red queen scratched her shoulder with supreme nonchalance.

Demeter rubbed her ears. They were much too sensitive in the cold…

"Hurry!" Cassandra said, worry in her voice and her eyes glued to the scene below. "He's going to—Alonzo!"

Before any of them could stop her, Cassandra wildly grabbed a snowy object from the neighboring pile and hurtled it down at the gray tomcat below, who was poised on the edge of a smacking the black-and-white tom into next week.

* * *

"Pounce?"

Tumble stopped dead. Pouncival turned back, irritated at this delay when it was snowing (actually, hailing) harder than ever.

But his irritation turned to worry as he saw the frozen look on Tumble's face, which was a shade of green.

"Pounce..."

Pounce leaned in, placing a paw gently on Tumble's limp shoulder. "Are you alright? Did you hurt yourself?"

"I did something stupid, Pounce."

Pounce coaxed Tumble in a sitting position, and stood blocking the snow from him. "We've got to get you back to the den. Take a quick rest."

"No!" Tumble's answer could only be called a shriek.

Pounce's heart started thumping painfully. He felt almost sick with worry over Tumble's predicament.

"I-I wrote down things, Pounce. In my soldier's log. Things that should never be discovered."

Pounce frowned, heart still pounding, but less so since Tumble's broken ribs weren't causing the problem. "Things? Huh? What sort of things?"

"And I left it out," Tumble whispered, so low that Pounce could barely make him out over the storm. "When you came to get me, I was so excited to see Electra that I-" he gulped comically-"left it out on Jelly's bed."

Pounce was nonplussed. "So? Why is that a big deal? Everyone already knows you like Electra; that's no secret."

Tumble swallowed, staring at Pounce's right knee. "I mentioned your quote about Plato."

Pounce's ears stood up straight. "What quote about Plato?" Plato, whom they'd left back at the den. With the journal.

"The...one about his head...being stuck...up his..." Tumble didn't need to finish; the jerk from Pouncival indicated that he remembered well enough his quote about Plato's head being stuck up his ass.

Pounce's mouth fell open. His lips quivered.

"And...the fact...that we..." his voice shrank even more "are the spies..."

Pounce sat down suddenly in the snow, head lolling like a toy mouse.

"Oh...my...Heavyside..."

Tumble's greenish complexion grew greener. He looked as though he'd be throwing up any moment.

Pounce looked at him suddenly, fiercely. "Plato's going to murder us! And I do not want to be murdered right now!" He stood up, and started pacing maniacally. He laughed a madman's laugh. "Things are going really well with Etcy. It's the start of something, Tumble, something good and serious and _I do not want to be murdered right now_!"

"I'm so sorry," Tumble whispered. "I'll try to convince him to murder only me." A cold sweat broke out at the thought of the pain that would entail-Tumble felt that broken ribs were quite bad enough.

Pounce shook his head wildly, still pacing. "You know Plato! And then he'll tell Alonzo, and Munkustrap!" His voice reached a higher pitch. "Munkustrap, who is just about ready to snap and kill someone anyways!"

"Killed by Plato and Munkustrap," Tumble repeated in horror, now the color of a houseplant. He flopped backward in the snow.

Pounce paced for another full minute before he realized that the stress, combined with fear and mixed with a good deal of rib pain, had knocked Tumble clean out.

* * *

Plato grumbled, "How could they kick us out on a night like this? In a blizzard? I mean, I don't even think they're going to _use_ that den…" He used a broad shoulder to push through some quickly-freezing snow, making a path towards Jenny's warm, dry, and hopefully-safe den.

Victoria couldn't help but blush, the soft pink flush on her cheeks practically the only part of her visible in the swirling white and grayness around them. She pressed into Plato, thankful for his warmth, thankful for his imposing size, and thankful for his presence on a frigid, stormy night. She nuzzled him affectionately, her white headfur almost but not quite blending in the cream color of his flank.

In answer, Plato's arm wrapped around her and she looked up into his smiling green eyes.

"You doing okay, Vic?"

"Freezing," she answered. "You?"

He laughed, the sound snatched away by the storm. "I'm pretty cold."

"No time to waste," she said promptly, blushing more when he ducked in for a kiss. "Let's hurry and get inside."

At once his protector instincts took over, and Plato glanced around the junkyard, ears high, nose sniffing. Victoria hoped he could see, hear, or smell more than she could, or they'd be lost in the blinding whiteness for a while.

Finally Plato dropped his head. His lips found her right ear and he said, loudly: "This way. Keep hold of me at all times."

She couldn't resist joking. "Is it going to be a bumpy ride? Are we expecting turbulence?" This new thing with Plato made her goofy.

He smirked, but his priority was her safety, and he didn't otherwise acknowledge the joke. "Let's go." And they did.

Victoria hated that frigid, remorseless trek, which felt like it took hours instead of mere minutes. The very breath was stolen from her lips by the wind, and when she was able to suck it down it made her throat ache. The hail beat against her back and head, not quite painful but by no accounts pleasant.

Her numb paw on Plato's broad side, with only the slightest hint of warmth on the palm, was the only thing that kept her going.

Suddenly, he wasn't there.

Victoria jerked her head around, feeling stiff and stupid. Where was he?

Then Plato's face and arms were there, pulling her out of the noise and cold and into the blessed warmth of Jennyanydot's den—the queen's home base.

The noise of the storm subdued, Victoria tucked her chin into her shoulder, trying to rub out the ringing in her ears.

"All right?"

Plato. Victoria was surprised how quickly she recovered; warmth rushing into her veins.

"Yes." She smiled, and looked around eagerly. "Jemima? Jelly? Jenny?" Her eyes narrowed, trying to make out forms in the dim light. "Etcy? Ele? Jemima? Coricopat?"

Only silence and solitude.

Plato said, blithely: "It appears your team is missing."

Victoria sat for a long moment, long enough for Plato to come over and settle in.

She broke away. "Oh no, Plato!"

"I don't like the sound of that…" He looked at her. Victoria said firmly, "We have to go find the others. Especially Jemima. She's so tiny, a gust of wind outside would seriously mess her up." Her voice shook.

Plato didn't look at all surprised at her declaration, only slightly fazed. "Ah well. I suppose we've had enough alone time for a while, don't you think, Vic?"

* * *

Etcetera, humming loudly to ignore the cold wind biting every part of her body, called back: "Just about there, Electra!"

The calico queen scampered over to join her friend. "I know, Etcy."

"No time at all!"

"I got it." Electra tried not to scowl; her eyes were already red and her nose blue as a blueberry and ice particles clinging to her headfur and whiskers. She knew she looked a fright.

She breathed hotly into her paws and tried to smooth the delicate furs on her face.

It wasn't working. Electra sighed.

"Right here!" Etcy gestured excitedly. The pale tabby dove into the hidden doorway of Jelly's den. Electra took a ragged breath, and followed.

"Tumble?" she called. Her heart started racing.

But the den was empty. Etcetera made a face. "Golly. Where are they?"

Electra walked over to the flattened cushion that was Jelly's bed. She picked up a lonely bandage. "Well, they _were_ here."

Etcetera nodded in agreement. She said "Pouncy?" in a hopeful tone, even though it was clear he wasn't around. She checked out every corner of the den. "Look at this!" she said brightly, holding up a fleck of glitter.

Electra batted her paw away. "Where are they? It's a blizzard outside! Tumble shouldn't be out! It's dangerous!"

"We went out," Etcetera pointed out. She winked at Electra. "Because you just can't wait to see Tumble!"

Electra scratched her foot vigorously. "As I recall, it was you who kept saying 'Pouncy? Pouncy? Shouldn't we go get more news from Pouncy?'"

Smirking, the pale queen shook her head. "You were just as happy as I was to find Tumble—admit it!"

Electra gave her a benevolent punch.

"Fine. Don't admit it. It's obvious." Etcetera had an air of maddening superiority that, combined with her overwhelming cheerfulness, made Electra turn purple in irritation.

"Shut up, Etcy." Electra went to the doorway. She was suddenly frightened. "We've got to go find them. They might be in trouble."

Etcetera came up beside her, sobered. She laid a paw on Electra's shaking shoulder. "We will." Then her nose turned up. "Anywho, we should get out of here. This place _stinks_."

* * *

Jemima huddled under a flimsy cardboard box. It was so limp that every new gust of wind would make it raise up, flap wildly, and come back down, knocking against her. She gritted her teeth, trying to control the shivers wracking her body.

She wasn't quite sure where she was, at the moment. When Mistoffelees had stalked off with the promise of another match-up at a later date, she had shrugged it off and headed in a direction she thought was south. But when the wind and snowfall increased, Jemima had the sneaking suspicion they were turning her ever so slightly so that she had no idea where she was going.

Her teeth chattered helplessly. Jemima tugged at the soggy brown flaps of the box, trying to keep it anchored down. Her best chance of surviving the storm was to stay put, and stay warm.

Although, Jemima reflected, those requirements might cancel each other out. If she stayed under this stupid box, she'd probably freeze to death.

"Well," she told herself, "it's your fault. I wonder if…?" She didn't say what she was thinking out loud, because it would be too hopeful. But she definitely wondered if anyone had even noticed she was gone. Especially her sworn opponent.

She really hoped so.

* * *

Mungojerrie watched indulgently as his sister alternately pushed, coaxed, and threatened Admetus into gaining an upright position. The brown-and-grey tomcat was rather reluctant to let go of his wounded tail.

Jerrie did feel a bit bad about that. After all, he was on the same team as Admetus.

Technically, _Tantomile_ was the enemy.

"Well, Tanto, how about this?" Jerrie grinned widely. "Three on one. You're surrounded. Now, I'm not about to let anyone attack you but me, but…"

Tantomile glared at him. The soft fur on her shoulders was rising.

"Seeing as you took me prisoner all sneaky-like earlier, I'd like to regain some manly honor here…" he trailed off. His queenfriend, normally calm, collected and superbly unaffected, was hissing, eyebrows meeting in a V-shape over the delicate bridge of her nose.

If Jerrie didn't know any better, he'd say she was raging mad.

"Tanto?" he said, weakly. She looked right past him. Jerrie turned to see what Rumpleteazer and Admetus were doing that could get her so upset.

Nothing, unless Tantomile was offended by the act of wiping snow from your whiskers. But Jerrie was pretty sure that wasn't the case. He peered harder at the couple, trying to see what they did that could have made Tantomile so angry…

Wait.

Jerrie's mind clicked into place. It wasn't _Tantomile_ who was angry…

Coricopat came out of nowhere. He flew through the turbulent air, a dark streak in the whirling gray snow, and hit Rumpleteazer hard. She was knocked off her feet, rolling over and over and finally coming to a stop against a frozen stack of tires.

Her head whipped up, her freckled face full of shock, and a hint of anger. Cori was right on top of her, and crammed a snowball the size of a Frisbee into her face.

"How about this for a snow-bomb, huh?" Cori grabbed more pawfuls of snow, stuffing them in Teazer's headfur. "And this? And this!"

Admetus growled, and made to step forward, but Mungojerrie held him back. "Cori…I think you've made your point." His tone held a warning. Rumpleteazer was his sister, and his partner in crime. Even if Cori was Tantomile's brother.

Coricopat promptly grabbed a hold of Teazer's wriggling body and shoved her down in the snow. "Fine. I'm done here." He stepped away, stretching. His eyes swept over his sister, Mungojerrie, and Admetus, who was snarling and trying to break free of Jerrie's hold.

Exotica appeared, suddenly. The darkness of the sky and storm made her approach almost invisible. "Feel better?" Her smile suggested she was having a good deal of fun.

Cori nodded gratefully. "Very much so." He smiled in return.

And that was when Rumpleteazer recovered from his sneak attack and jumped him. Down they both went, landing hard in the snow.

Jerrie yelped in surprise, and Tanto's eyes narrowed. She seemed to have recovered somewhat from Cori's violent mood, but the aftereffects were lingering.

"Teazer!" Jerrie yelled, trying to get her attention away from scratching, biting, and pummeling every inch of Coricopat she could reach. "Teazer, stop it! You did have it coming!"

Exotica said, sounding a bit worried: "She fights rough, doesn't she? Cori didn't want to hurt her; he just wanted to humiliate her…" She rubbed her shoulders, nails digging into her fur. "He would never hurt a queen!"

Tantomile hissed. "That is it! Let's settle this!" And with that, she jumped into the fray. Screeches, hissing, and yowls rose up in cacophony.

Mungojerrie groaned loudly, but over the hubbub and the blizzard he was barely heard. His grip on Admetus loosened, but the streaked tomcat was so busy staring in disbelief that he stood stock-still. Jerrie swore, and said roughly to Exotica:

"Keep a paw on him. I'm going in."

Exotica and Admetus stood there, watching the psychics and the thieves battle with scratches, bites, and copious amounts of snow.

Exotica turned to Admetus. "Perhaps we should?"

He blinked finally and looked at her. "Well?"

"We could just wait it out. Let them deal with their issues. Find some shelter."

"Or?"

"Or jump in. Defend the objects of our affection."

"You?"

"I'm in. Cori's not going to be snow-bombed ever again."

Admetus' grin was so wide it took over his entire face. "Unless Teazer and I get to him first."

Exotica wiggled her eyebrows. "Alrighty, then. Bring it!"

And just like that, the two watchers became active participants in the wild snow-battle that was raging with no sign of stopping, freezing blizzard or no freezing blizzard.

* * *

A large chunk of ice, harder than a rock, smashed into Munkustrap's head. He shook it off, and instinctively released Alonzo, turning and crouching towards the direction the missile had come from.

His eyes were narrowed, pupils darting about, searching for his attacker, but his breathing was controlled and steady.

Only one queen would dare to defy him like that.

He was finally ready for this stupid Snowball War to begin.

* * *

**A/N: DRAMA! And another cliffhanger; I'm sorry! But this is a two-part chapter...Next part should be up...soon.**  
**Thanks for reading! I know it's tense right now; but things are going to get fun. And funnier. And maybe a bit more dramatic. **  
**Hope you enjoyed!**


	11. Blizzard Part II

Munkustrap's ears flattened against his head, and his whiskers twitched violently. He shook his head quickly, expertly removing all impacted snow from his headfur. His eyes narrow, teeth bared, cold hard gaze sweeping over the cold turbulent grey junkyard ahead. With his heightened senses working through the storm, he heard Alonzo at his back, breathing heavily. And he saw—

A blur of gold and black.

Eyelids twitching in the flurry of snow, Munkustrap sharpened his gaze.

Again, the flurry of black and gold fur swept by, closer than ever. Another snowball came hurtling through the air, narrowly missing him. Munk's hind legs coiled in anticipation of a strike. He was fairly certain he could make out Demeter's streaked pattern…

There!

He jumped, and only a tiny portion of his mind registered when he was hit from the side, knocked flat into the snow. But not for long—Munk rolled back to all fours, hackles raised, unexpectedly facing his little brother, who also stood, shaking out.

"Tugger!" he growled, barely able to form the name through clenched teeth.

Tugger shook out. Urgently, "Listen, Munk—" but not another word got out before Alonzo joined in the conversation by tackling Tugger, a rather triumphant expression on his face. "Gotcha, _spy_!"

"Alonzo!"

"No!"

Two rather sultry female voices, currently raised in alarm, sounded from close by. Munkustrap didn't care, even when he saw Bomba spitting at his second-in-command and Cassandra trying to pull Alonzo off by yanking his tail.

He had just seen Demeter's pale face, peering around the corner of a junkpile. Munk ignored the commotion behind him, even the shrieks from the two queens and the yell from his brother: "Chill, Munkustrap!"

He leapt forward. Demeter's face disappeared, but he quickly caught sight of her mostly-black tail and followed, hotly, closing the distance.

Demeter. This was the first time he'd seen her in almost three days. His heart was pounding, his veins flooding with adrenaline from the chase.

She looked back quickly, kicked some snow in his direction, and sprinted around a corner.

Munk hissed, blinking against the sting of snow, and raced after her. He didn't know what to do or say to his mate. All he knew was that he was mad, mad enough to…to…

He rounded the corner and found Demeter pressed flat against a towering crate, slick with ice, her chest heaving mightily. All around snow was packed tightly into the crevasses between the frozen junkpiles, forming a solid wall of dirty grey. She was trapped.

Munk slowed greatly, approaching one step at a time. Eyes still narrowed, he stood from his crouch, using his size automatically to tower over the small queen mere feet away. He hissed.

His breathing was ragged, deep. His mind barely registered thoughts, only churning feelings inside. Seeing Demeter again brought a wealth of emotions, some rather painful. Anger, full-out-rage, pleasure, contentment, hope, fear, and uncertainty. But the emotion quickly winning out was overwhelming relief, and affection—mixed with a bit of irritation.

But that was before he saw Demeter's face.

She was staring at him, lovely green eyes wide and fearful, back flattened against the crate, chewed-off nails digging into the icy wood behind her, lips parted and trembling.

She was terrified. Of him.

And Munkustrap felt horrid, his blood turning to ice in his veins. She'd only ever been afraid of Macavity, never him. Not him. He was her guardian, her protector, her comforter.

Her lover.

Munk's posture instantly relaxed. Seeing her like this, all he wanted to do was hold her, and promise that nothing like this would ever happen again. That he was nothing like his elder brother, Macavity.

But something in her expression, and his own guilt, stabbed him. He backed up, opening his arms in a gesture of apology, but Demeter, after biting her lip and staring at him hard, slipped on by, moving swiftly out of his sight.

Munk stayed frozen. The accusations in his head screamed _What kind of monster are you? What have you done to your love? _

_What have you done?_

* * *

Victoria shook Plato's shoulder, digging in her nails just to make sure he was feeling her.

His lips descended on her shivering ear: "What, Vic?"

Victoria pointed. "I see Misto! Up ahead."

Plato didn't look particularly pleased at this, but taking his cue from Victoria, headed quickly in that direction.

Upon reaching Mistoffelees' small sheltered area, Vic breathed a sigh of relief (it was really, very cold out here) and said without preamble: "Misto-Jemima's-missing-have-you-seen-her?"

Mistoffelees, who appeared to be struggling with a pair of candy cane bagpipes, jumped. "What?" His dark, searching gaze swept over Victoria and her large companion. He stared at Plato a bit rudely, as if asking in his head, "What are you doing here?"

Plato said, bluntly: "Jemima's out there. In this blizzard." Victoria nodded desperately, eyes filling with icy tears (she really, really didn't like the cold) and said: "Misto—please, don't you have any idea where she is?"

Misto shook his head, wordless. His features contracted, and his lips moved silently, worriedly.

Plato prompted, "You were supposed to be watching her—"

"I know that!" he snapped, standing up straight, the black hair on his shoulders rising. "I know. I shouldn't have left her…" His harsh expression broke for an instant, and Victoria saw how truly alarmed he was. It alarmed her to see that, because her good friend was never at a loss. His magic, his extraordinary senses, his cleverness were all a match for whatever life in the junkyard could throw at him.

Plato said: "Then you have no idea where she is now?"

Misto looked at him, calm again. "No. But I'll find her."

Victoria, not quite sure what was going on between the two toms, butted in: "Alright, Misto. Well, we already covered most of the southern junkyard…"

"I said _I'll_ find her," Misto emphasized. "Consider it done!" There was such a fervency in his tone that Victoria believed him, completely, for a whole ten seconds. Then natural doubts crept in. "But—"

"Vic," Plato said, sharing, finally, an understanding look with Mistoffelees, "He'll handle it. We should get you back inside."

Victoria saw that there was no arguing with the two of them. And really, if anyone could find Jemima, it was the Magical Mr. Mistoffelees. "Okay, then. But one question?"

"Yes?"

"What in the world are you doing here with Tugger's bagpipes?"

Misto winced. "Um, yeah. Long story short, I'm trying to get the snow out. It's frozen-stuck. But there are more important things now!" And like that, the magical tom disappeared, leaving a very confused pair of cats blinking in the cold.

* * *

A brown-and-white tom was unceremoniously being dragged through the snow, leaving a body trail behind that might have been amusing under less lethal circumstances. Pounce let out an exhausted huff, and filled his lungs with air, arms and legs aching something fierce from dragging the much-larger Tumblebrutus through the snow.

Through the steadily falling snowflakes and harsh wind, he saw the black coat of Mistoffelees, several yards ahead in a little sheltered area, smacking and shaking some inanimate object. Pounce huffed again, and called, "Misto!"

And just as soon as his voice sounded, he saw the large, foreboding form of Plato entering Mistoffelees' immediate area.

Pounce jumped, and latched onto unconscious Tumble, dragging them both behind a box of fish that was sadly empty. His heart rate increased tenfold, and he squeezed his eyes shut, praying to the Everlasting Cat that Plato hadn't heard him.

He really, really didn't want to be murdered by Plato before he had a chance to tell Etcetera how her laugh was the sweetest thing he'd ever heard.

He waited, tense, but warmed by apprehension. Finally, after what seemed like ages, he peered out.

Nobody was there.

Pounce sighed, partly relieved and partly resigning himself to the task of dragging Tumble somewhere safer, and definitely warmer. After all, being one of the spies, he owed it to Tumble to make sure that Tumble got to say goodbye to Electra, before he died of broken ribs and hypothermia, or, if that didn't do it, Plato, Alonzo, or Munkustrap…

* * *

"Etcy! There's Vic!"

Etcetera whirled around, trying to use Electra's comment as a beacon to locate her big sister. "Vicky! Where?"

Electra indicated with a toss of her head, saying, "She's over by Mistoffelees…and…wait…there's Plato!"

"Plato!" Etcetera hissed, scooping some snow into a perfect sphere. "The nerve! Parading Victoria around as his prisoner!"

"There goes Mistoffelees," Electra reported, frankly confused. "He looked…rather freaked out, tell you the truth…"

Etcetera ignored her friend, focusing all her energy on making a second, third, and fourth snowball. "You know, I think I'm getting pretty good at this!" she added brightly.

Electra reported: "They're turning—heading back this way! He's got a hold on her paw!" A nudge at her shoulder made her turn, quickly.

Nudging her was a snowball. Held up by Etcetera, who raised an eyebrow. Electra took it, nodding grimly. "Let's."

When Plato and Victoria came closer, unaware, Etcetera took aim and threw. She was the best at this snowball business—her shot hit Plato in the face.

Electra darted to the side unprotected by Victoria and hurtled the snowball, striking Plato's flank.

Etcy darted forward, seizing her sister's arm. "Victoria! Run!" She pulled mightily, separating the white queen from her captor.

Electra, meanwhile, plastered Plato with a third snowball, although he managed to block the brunt of it with his forearm. "Quit it!"

Electra sneered. "Who's not allowed to play now, Mr-High-And-Mighty?" The fourth snowball was speeding towards its target, but Plato smacked it away easily. He hissed, backing away, and reached for Victoria, hissing more strenuously when he found her gone, never once taking his eyes off Electra.

Electra knew that look, the danger, the madness in a tom's eyes. She knew what it meant for her, but took a quick breath and packed more snow together, forming her fifth and final snowball…

"Etcetera! Electra!" It was Victoria's voice, rather commanding. "Stop!"

To the protestations of Etcetera, Victoria strode forward, planting herself firmly between Plato and Electra. She shook her head. "Plato is…" she paused, turned slightly pink in the face, and continued: "helping. He's helping us find Jemima!"

Etcetera blinked confusedly, and looked at Electra, who stared, nonplussed, at Victoria and the tom behind her. "Jemima? Where's Jemima?"

Vic said, worriedly, "No one knows. You two haven't seen her?"

Etcetera said brightly, "Well, of course! Yes. A while ago. Actually…" she looked at Electra for help. Electra's frown of confusion deepened. "Jemima's missing?"

"Yes," Plato said, stepping next to Vic and putting his arm around her in what Electra considered an overly-familiar gesture. But Victoria didn't seem put-out…to the contrary, she smiled and nuzzled the large tomcat, her paw coming to rest on top of his.

Etcetera's wide eyes took in the scene, blinked, and then regained her usual bright n' cheerful expression. She winked at Electra.

Electra, somewhat placated that Victoria was alright but not too pleased at couple-y signs of affection from anyone, frowned more. The tiny icicles clinging to her eyelashes crinkled against her brow. "So. Let's find Jem."

"And Pouncy and Tumble!" Etcetera burst in. Her expression was anxious, and mirrored Electra's feelings on the subject perfectly.

Electra, out of learned habit, had kept her gaze focused on the threatening figure of Plato, and saw an odd expression pass across his face at the mention of "Pouncy and Tumble". Her guard rose, and she asked, quietly, "Have you seen Pouncival or Tumblebrutus?"

"No." Victoria answered for them, while Plato blinked a few times, clearing his face of that odd expression.

"Doesn't matter. Mistoffelees will find Jemima. All of you queens—" he nodded towards them—"need to get inside. The storm's getting worse."

"But P—"

Electra cut of Etcetera's complaint swiftly. "Okay. We'll meet you back there."

Plato raised an eyebrow, and said, "Not a chance. We've lost one queen, and the safest place for you is out of this storm." Victoria nodded in agreement, and shivered just to prove the point.

Electra's mind raced. There was really no arguing with him…but Tumble might be in danger! And yet, it didn't look like they were going to be able to shake Plato. But still—Tumble!

Etcetera said it for her. "But…Pounce and Tumble are out in the storm…they might be in trouble?"

Okay, Electra definitely didn't like the look on Plato's face. It was rather…sinister. But he said only, in what was meant to be a conciliatory tone, "Okay. After I bring you three back to Jenny's den, I'll see if I can find Pouncy and Tumble…"

* * *

An orange-and-white-and-black tabby flopped back, heaving mightily, and said, in a strained tone of voice: "Truce, okay? Truce, truce, let's have a bit o' truce."

"You said it, Rumpleteazer," Coricopat wheezed, limbs spread wildly over the snow. He coughed and pulled his tail out from under Admetus, who was also gasping for breath. Draped over his right leg was his sister Tantomile, slowly rubbing snow in her face to cool down. Mungojerrie popped up from behind Exotica, both panting and looking rather worse for wear. Tantomile rolled over, and over, and over again to come up beside Jerrie. "Jerrie, your poor ear…"

He gave a wan smile, too tired for his usual rakishness. "You fight dirty, Love."

She smoothed the torn ear, soothing, "It's not too bad—I can definitely fix this," in a tone that was more reassuring herself than the tabby tom, who shrugged the injury off. "Just a quick trip to my owner's, and—"

"I'm _hungry_," Teazer moaned, rubbing her scraped-up stomach, the white fur mingled with bright red and deep crimson. "Fighting give me appetite!"

"I agree," Admetus approved.

Exotica rolled her slanted eyes. "It's okay to _not_ agree with her, you know."

Admetus raised both eyebrows high, and managed to look condescending. "I happen to be hungry."

Cori raised one eyebrow and was condescending-looking without even trying. "For once, the thief is right."

Tanto wagged a finger at her twin brother. "Don't start. There is a truce."

Jerrie said heartily, "Yeah. Temporary peace!" He kissed Tanto soundly on the cheek, and nuzzled her with his nose. "Let's make the best of this bad scenario, here."

Exotica looked around, noting the howling wind, biting cold, and flying snow. "Good point. Let's get out."

"Have some dinner!" Admetus said, grinning at Teazer, who grinned right back and pushed herself into a sitting position.

"Triple-date!" Tanto said happily. She nuzzled Mungojerrie affectionately. "It was a double date that started out relationship, remember?"

Jerrie gave her a squeeze. "How could I forget, Darlin? That was the best night of my life…or at least, in the top ten…"

Coricopat, getting up from the ground, looked rather sour, as though he remembered something very different from that night. Rumpleteazer, too, wore a face of disgust. She held up her paws expectantly, and Admetus, realizing his cue, reached down and pulled her up. He might have pulled too hard, or Teazer might have overshot, because she ended up pressed against his chest.

Cori, noting this, extended a paw to help Exotica up. Exotica smiled, and nuzzled him warmly, snuggling into his side.

Teazer wrapped both arms around Admetus, who looked a bit confused but very happy. She squeezed fiercely.

Cori gave Exotica a kiss.

Teazer grabbed Admetus' paws and wrapped them around her waist.

"Jellicles!" Tanto broke in, "I'm not getting warmer standing here."

Jerrie gave her a pinch. "Not at all?"

Tanto fixed him with a calculating look. "Later, Lover. Right now, we all need to get out of this junkyard, find some warm food and have a good, solid rest."

Exotica pulled Cori. "Do let's. We can come back tomorrow morning, after the storm's blown over."

They all headed towards the fence at the west end of the junkyard, Teazer still clinging tightly to Admetus' side even though no one was looking.

* * *

"Her face." Voice breaking, Munkustrap added, "I've never seen her look so frightened…" he trailed off in a whisper, and rubbed his face, harshly, as though he could erase the sight of Demeter's wide eyes and trembling lips.

Alonzo, on the other side of the den, nursing a black-and-blue patch on his normally white eye, stopped his ministrations to look at the Jellicle Protector. He slid to all fours and moved closer to Munkustrap, stopping to put a paw on the shaking gray shoulder.

"Listen, Munk—she's alright. You didn't hurt her. You had control."

"I didn't!" Munk whispered. "I didn't, not at first! And you didn't see her face…" he buried his face in his arms.

"Munk," Alonzo said, gently. "No harm was done. You got a little wound up. Demeter will understand. She knows you love her."

Munk didn't answer, but kept his face hidden and his eyes squeezed shut.

Alonzo continued, almost talking to himself, "I never meant to hurt Cass. Never. But…the competition…I was being stupid, and I—" he sighed. "All I want is to get her back. But Cass is stubborn. And proud…we really are a match."

Munk raised his head enough to give his friend a watery smile.

Alonzo shrugged, rolling his shoulders. "Probably just have to have it out until the end. Get it all out. Then she'll calm down."

Munk frowned. "Didn't she already have the opportunity to cream you back there? When I was—" he swallowed hard.

Alonzo grimaced, flicking his pupils towards the den's door. "I was taking care of that stupid traitorous furball, when Cass and Bomba started screaming like the world was ending and—" he stopped. "Oh."

Munk nodded wryly. "He was trying to keep a hold on me, so that I didn't do exactly what I ended up doing. Frighten Dem."

"How heroic," Alonzo drawled, less than impressed. "But if he was truly on Demeter's side, he probably should have followed rather than take hold of Bomba. Haven't seen him since."

Right on cue, the Rum Tum Tugger walked into the den, covered in slush, dripping, and wearing an expression that seemed to say, "I hate the world and everything in it, especially you, Alonzo."

Alonzo didn't move a muscle, but said cuttingly: "I wonder what happened to you."

Tugger said, "You really don't want to know." And his smirk was really unsettling after that declaration.

* * *

Demeter squirmed, fitfully, unable to get any semblance of rest even though Jenny's bed was soft and warm. She turned to face the dark Abyssinian keeping watch on her.

Cassandra slunk over, expression deliberately calm. "How are you, Demeter?"

Demeter's eyes filled with tears. She shook her head, pushing herself into a sitting position. "He's nothing like Mac."

Cassandra looked politely confused. "What?"

"He's nothing like Macavity," Demeter said, more strongly, wiping her eyes with the back of her paw. "I love him so much."

Cassandra said nothing. She just blinked those startling blue eyes, and asked, with the twitch of her mouth, _Why_?

"His face," Demeter said softly, crossing her arms around her knees. "When he had me, cornered, he was mad. Could barely think straight; I've seen that look on tomcats before. But once he saw _me_…" Demeter choked, and said warmly, "His eyes…they were so loving—like always, and he—"

Cassandra nuzzled her, encouragingly.

"When he saw my face, he backed away—so ashamed! Nothing like Macavity!" Demeter finished forcefully, digging her chin into her knees. She looked up at Cassandra through watery eyes. "I just want to be with him. I wish this whole war was over right now and I was back in his arms!" She bit her lower lip, tears spilling out heedless of her attempts to stop them.

Cass said wisely, "Well. Now he's probably a bit torn up himself, and I'm sure he wants the same thing. But we need to finish this war. Demeter," she turned the queen's face towards her, "you can't be ruled by fear. Face this. Throw a snowball at him. Let all hell break loose. I mean, you know now that he'll never hurt you."

Demeter nodded, a gleam returning to her green eyes. "Yes. But it's going to be a lot of work getting him to fight back!"

Cassandra smiled fiercely. "That's it! Show him that you just want to play. You don't need to be protected from snowballs, cold and annoying as they may be!" By the end of this impassioned speech, both queen broke into giggles.

Until Bombalurina slunk in, covered in slush, shivering up a storm. At Demeter's exasperated sigh and Cassandra's epic eye-roll, she help up both paws. "Hey. At least we're even."

* * *

**A/N: Next chapter is (surprise, surprise!) already completed and scheduled for release tomorrow evening. Have fun!**


	12. Here Lies Pounce, Murdered by Plato

_Electra was smiling at him, looking so beautiful that his dopey grin threatened to consume his whole body. He felt the corners of his mouth turn elastic, and stretch wider, and wider, until they snapped back in painfully at the sight of Plato, teeth bared, fangs looking sharp—too sharp to be real. _

_Tumble screamed. And whirled away to run, but ran right into Munkustrap, who seemed to have grown, and whose stripes were growing and darkening, becoming black slashes across his impressive arms and chest. Tumble backed away, and there was Alonzo, with a paw raised, claws out and eager for his blood. _

_He turned desperately, and there was the Rum Tum Tugger, mane sticking up as if electrified and a crazy smile on his face. "They thought _I_ was the spy," he growled, and Tumble spun in a circle, while the blood-thirsty toms closed in on him…_

A sharp smack woke Tumble from his nightmare. "Youch!" he screamed, a bit higher than he'd like anyone to know.

Pounce shook his head exasperatedly. "You weren't getting any rest, so there."

Tumble pushed himself up, marveling at the soft cloth under his body and paws and the moderate temperature hugging his skin. But most of all, he marveled in the smell—the gorgeous, blessed smell that wrapped around his nose so lovingly.

"Wow," was all he could say as his eyes caught up with the rest of his senses, taking in the den around him, cluttered but cozy. Various pieces of junk, including books, a mirror, and what looked like pieces of a chandelier were draped with heavy cloth, keeping out the chill from outside.

Pounce patted the rich red cloth underneath him. "Yeah. Nice, right?"

Tumble's eyes found the source of light, as well as the heavenly smell.

A glowing red candle, flame flickering cheerfully, was emitting the enticing aroma. Tumble leaned forward, reading the label. "Apple Raspberry Cinnamon!"

Pounce nodded, smirking a bit. "Explains a lot, right?"

Tumble, breathing deeply through his nose, asked, "What?"

"It's Tugger's den."

"Oh?" The mirror. Of course.

Pounce raised an eyebrow and looked around from his position lounging against the stack of books. "Attractive smell. It explains _everything_." He ran a finger down a bolt of silky cloth spilling from the books. "Somebody likes the color _red_…"

Tumble spotted the candy cane bagpipes hastily thrown against a wall. He reached over and settled them carefully in the upright position, lest Tugger kill him for real. "How did we…"

"Mistoffelees," Pounce said promptly. "He popped up right in front of me, muttered something about 'Wrong cats' but when I begged him to help, he did, and stuck us up here, before promptly disappearing a sparkly maelstrom. Guess he figured if we wreck anyone's den, it might as well be Tugger's."

"Oh?"

Pounce nodded. "They're all out looking for Jemima, apparently. Including Plato, which is why you don't see me volunteering."

At the mention of "Plato" Pounce visibly deflated. Tumble knew how he felt. It was this dawning sense of the inevitable, the certain promise of pain and humiliation that couldn't be avoided.

Why did he have to leave that stupid journal out? Why? _Why_?

Tumble let out a groan, raking his paws through his headfur. "I'm such an idiot."

"We're all fools in love," Pounce said mournfully, dropping to his back, staring up at the ceiling. There was a long pause in which Tumble considered apologizing again, but Pounce spoke. "I've been thinking over things to put on my grave. Here lies Pounce, murdered by Plato."

Tumble shivered. "Don't be so morbid!"

"Here next to him lies Tumble, also murdered by Plato."

"Cut it out!" Tumble's fur stood up. "I do not want to be murdered by Plato_ in theory_!"

"Mourned by his darling Etcetera, who never knew how much he cared." Pounce finished with a long, passionate sigh.

"Don't you think I know how that feels?" Tumble asked, nettled, because Pounce had had several opportunities to kiss Etcetera and he was yet to even touch Electra in a more-than-friends manner.

"Satisfied in the knowledge that his friend Tumble is keeping him company in the afterlife." Another pause, and then, "Hey, Tumble? Do you think murdered cats go up to the Heavyside Layer? Or…traitors?"

Tumble begged, "Please. Can we talk about something else?"

Pounce flopped his tail. "Sure. See if anything else comes to your mind with the idea of death-by-Plato looming over you."

And because Pouncival had put it like that, Tumblebrutus found himself unable to think of anything else.

* * *

A bolt of lightning erupted at the speed of…well, light. Mistoffelees wiped his nose ruefully. It was all Cassandra's fault; he'd bumped into her briefly while looking for Jemima and she had sneezed in his face…

Misto sighed and glanced around, sharp eyes taking in everything and leaving nothing out. A flapping cardboard box caught his attention, but upon inspection it was empty and soggy. Wait—

A short red hair was plastered against the top. Misto lifted it up with an exclamation. "Jemima!" His eyes swept around quicker than ever as he searched for the little queen.

"Jemima!"

It was hard to keep the panic out of his voice. But he knew he would find her. He balled the red hair in his paw, concentrating hard. The faintest trail appeared in front of him, and Misto followed, darting through the snow and hail and wind until he reached the end.

It was an old refrigerator, long out of date, lying on its side.

Misto filled his lungs. "Jemima!" _Please, let her be here_…His heart stood still in his chest as the seconds ticked by.

Then the upper compartment of the refrigerator teetered open, and Jemima's big brown eyes shone out from her pale, shivering face. "Misto!"

He pushed the door open wider and dropped inside, closing it tightly behind him. A little bit of cold blue light leaked in the hinges, but for the most part the compartment was air-tight.

"Misto!" she sobbed, and he wrapped his arms around her, feeling her chilled fur, feeling her scared heart beating rapidly beneath his, her own arms squeezing his middle tightly.

"It's alright," he said, biting back the sob of relief that threatened to engulf him. "You found a good spot."

He felt her pull away slightly, and breathe out. "I did, didn't I?" There was a touch of pride in her voice.

He nodded and pulled her closer. She went willingly, nuzzling his chest, purring deep inside.

Misto couldn't wait. He leaned down and kissed her.

Jemima went still. So close to her face, he could feel her heavy eyelashes blinking, tickling his cheek. He pulled away abruptly.

"Hey!" Jemima sounded surprised. "Why'd you stop?"

The tuxedo cat turned and peered closely at the little calico queen, looking so innocent and sweet and lovely that it made his heart pang. She didn't seem offended, rather the opposite.

Misto stepped forward and pulled her into his arms again, kissing her soundly. Jemima responded enthusiastically, wrapping her own arms around his heck, running her nails through his headfur, rubbing right under the ears.

Mistoffelees shivered, and sat, bringing Jemima down to rest on his lap. "We were so worried about you."

She was pleased. "We? You guys did notice!"

Misto shot her a look. Jemima smiled, the wan blue light catching in her luminous eyes. "So, what's happening out there?" And because she was afraid she sounded too business-like, she snuggled closer.

Misto chuckled and pulled her closer. "Plato's dragging Vic, Etcy and Ele back to the queen's den. Pounce and Tumble are hiding from Plato. Cassandra has a cold, and she gave it to me. Hopefully, Tugger won't find out about the bagpipes. Munk finally faced Demeter—"

"And?" Jemima said, anxiously. Demeter had been worrisome lately.

Misto shook his head and sighed. "They're still working through it. Luckily, my senses tell me tomorrow will be a clear, sunny day, so there's a good chance everyone will just have it out, all in the open—"

Jemima cut in: "Oh yes! Misto, who wins part five? Winner take all?" Her eyes twinkled.

He sighed dramatically and gave her a squeeze. "Let's worry about that tomorrow."

Jemima nuzzled his neck. "Good, good. I'm good with that!"

Mistoffelees leaned down and gave her another soft kiss. "Me too."

* * *

"Your owners are wonderful!"

Exotica beamed. "My Tuesday family is rather marvelous. They believe in complete cat freedom, and fresh fish. Of course, it helps that the man is a fishmonger…"

Tantomile glanced around. "Huh. It's beginning to die down." Although the hail, snow, and wind were still whipping briskly through the southern junkyard, the psychic queen seemed to be looking beyond.

Coricopat added, "Tomorrow will be sunny and clear."

"Good." Teazer rolled her spine, stretching out. "I've just about had it with this storm!"

Mungojerrie pursed his lips, and absently rubbed a scratch on his hip. "Well then, triple-daters, what's the plan?"

Cori said, practically: "We should see what everyone else is doing. Assuming this snowball war is still going on."

He paused, and he and Tantomile turned in sync to face the enemy den, that of Jellyorum. A long, psychic pause later, Tanto confirmed: "It's still on. Messier than ever."

Rumpleteazer grinned and nudged Admetus, who was unobtrusively sticking to her like glue. "That makes for good betting!"

Cori sniffed. "That would be unethical."

"I'll bet your unethical butt gets _creamed_ by me!" Teazer spat.

"Truce," Jerrie and Tanto chimed at once. The couple looked at each other, surprised. Jerrie's grin grew, and Tanto said, thoughtfully: "That's the first time I've been in sync with another cat besides Coricopat…"

Cori's look of alarm was eased by Exotica, winding her tail around his. "Let's get inside."

Teazer reached over and grabbed a hold of Jerrie's ruff, but Tantomile grabbed his arm. She smiled, managing to look serene and yet unbelievably smug. "Hold on. I believe you're still my prisoner."

A groan went all around, but Jerrie seemed rather thrilled at the idea. "Maybe we should use your den?"

Cori's immediate protest was cut off by Exotica. "Cool. Then Cori and I can use the other den!"

Cori's eyes widened, and he looked down at Exotica like he'd never seen anything quite like her. She smiled enticingly.

"Go on, Cori," said Tanto. Jerrie nodded approval, giving his companion a wink.

Rumpleteazer carefully eased away from Admetus, turning rather red.

"Um."

Admetus, too, looked rather embarrassed.

Jerrie noticed, and without batting an eye, said, "Teaze, you'd better get back to Alonzo n' Munk and let them know I'm a prisoner." He gave Admetus a nod.

"Um, yeah!" she said, still red. She scampered off, pausing only to glance at Admetus, then look down. "You coming?"

"Yep." Admetus ran after her.

Jerrie put a lofty arm over Tanto's shoulders. "Ah, young love."

Tanto whispered something in his torn ear.

Jerrie's expression was somewhere between intrigued and impatient, and he and Tantomile headed away.

Cori shook his head. "Ah, dumb love."

Exotica swatted him. "Ah, new love. To the den!"

* * *

"We're here, it's Jenny's den, you can leave now." Electra tried to sound thankful, she really tried. But a glance at Victoria's disapproving face and she knew it just hadn't come out "thankful" to Plato.

"All the way inside," Plato insisted, nudged Electra forward. She sighed and descended into Jenny's den, which was already full of Demeter, Cassandra, Bombalurina, Coricopat, and Exotica. The whole team, minus Jemima. At least things were starting to come together.

Demeter called, "Electra! You're all right, thank Heavyside."

Electra shrugged off the concern. "I was a street cat. It was often cold." She looked up as Etcetera came in, looking rather grumpy.

"Plato kicked me in! Wanted 'to talk' with Vic." She settled in at Electra's side, curling around her friend, although Electra was still sitting upright. "Down, Ele! We need to cuddle! Of course, it would be nice _if Victoria was inside already_…" Etcetera said the last part of the statement in her loudest voice, so there was no doubt Plato and Victoria could hear it. Etcetera's "loud voice" was very, very loud. Tugger had banned her from using it inside, it was so loud.

Because it was so loud, Demeter winced, and Cassandra frowned. Bombalurina, curled into a tight ball and dozing, opened one eye, then promptly closed it again.

But it did the job—Victoria slipped into the den, superbly innocent. Etcy pouted, and fixed her sister with an accusatory eye.

The white queen ignored it.

"Where's Jem?" Demeter asked.

Victoria debated with herself for a moment, then answered: "She's with Mistoffelees."

Demeter nodded. "Okay. And how did you escape?"

Bombalurina's ears perked up, subtly, though her eyes stayed closed.

Victoria shrugged, letting the movement run through her body, ruffling her fur. "Plato. He guided us all here."

Demeter stood up suddenly. "Is he still here?"

Victoria, confused, answered, "Maybe?"

Demeter strode past them and hopped out of the den. Cassandra nodded grimly, and Bomba's head rose out of her red fur. "Demmie?"

"She's going to issue the challenge," Cassandra said in clipped tones. She really hadn't appreciated Bomba's absence when they were supposed to be tackling Alonzo together, although circumstances had been difficult.

Bomba rolled her neck, and went back to sleep.

Cassandra leaned over. "How do you manage?"

One amber eye opened. "Hmm?"

"So…not-tense. Able to relax."

The eye winked. "Oh, I think you know."

Cassandra, about to reply, was interrupted by Demeter's return. The black-and-gold queen's lips were tight, but she said quite easily:

"We're facing them tomorrow, in open field. And Plato assures me that they'll get Munkustrap out there. No more hiding." Now her voice shook.

Bomba uncurled and reached out to her sister, who dropped down into the embrace. "Exactly, Dem. Now, get some rest." Her nose wrinkled. "You really need your beauty sleep."

This earned another epic eye-roll from Cassandra.

"Tomorrow?" This from Coricopat. He yawned, and snuggled into Exotica's side. "I'll beam that into Tanto's dirty mind." Exotica snickered, and closed her eyes.

Electra waited. When the rest of the queens were finally resting, or pretending to doze (Demeter), she nudged Etcetera. The pale tabby looked over, rubbing the sleep from her bleary eyes. "Ele? What?"

Electra nosed into Etcetera's side, close to her ear. "I didn't like the look on Plato's face when we mentioned the boys. "

Etcy's expression grew clearer. "Electra," she said, in her calmest, most-grown-up voice, "I think you might be freaking out a bit too much. It's just a game, after all."

Electra continued, forcefully, "I think—I don't know, but—"

"We'll pack the glitter." Etcetera yawned. "If he tries anything…"

"Tumble's not going to get hurt ever again!" There was such a force in Electra's voice that Etcetera didn't want to even attempt to disagree.

* * *

Munkustrap tried to bury himself in the corner, but he could still hear the spat going on. It was subtle, it was snide, it was sarcastic, but it was grating and had the violence not been drained out of him, he would have smacked both Alonzo and Tugger.

But a tiny pebble thrown at his butt forced him to pull his head out, so he could glare at Tugger.

"Sorry, Munk," Tugger said, too sweetly. "I was aiming for the _other_ Ass." He gave Alonzo a pointed look.

Alonzo raised his upper lip in a snarl. "Since you pulled Bomba off of me, does this make you a triple agent? Or do you just like playing for both teams?"

Tugger said coolly, "I am my own agent implementing my own brilliant master plan."

Snickering, Alonzo asked, "And like all your master plans, does it end with Bomba flat—"

Tugger threw another pebble, this time with vengeance, and it struck Alonzo in his already-black eye. Alonzo reared up, intent on doing some damage, but Admetus managed to restrain him while Rumpleteazer shook her head at Tugger as though he were her own brother being very naughty.

"Soon, Fuzzy Wuzzy," Alonzo swore. "Very soon."

Tugger hissed, and turned away, still working at drying out his mane from the earlier slush incident.

Plato came in, and took in the scene quickly. "Demeter issues a challenge. Queens versus toms, all-out, tomorrow. In the clearing, by the Great Tire."

Munk, whose ears jumped at the mention of "Demeter", asked Plato, "Demeter herself challenged you? How—" he ran a paw through his headfur—"Was she alright?"

Plato stared at his fearless leader, who looked rather bent and broken and smaller than usual curled up in the corner. "She looked fine to me. Same as the first day we started this war." His mouth quirked up. "She especially requests that you find your way to the field of battle. I think she's got a snowball surprise for you!"

Tugger turned to grin at Munk: "You see? Stop moping, she's already over it." He shook out his mane wildly, and protests filled the air along with slush.

Plato slunk over to Jelly's bed, and retrieved a small booklet, slipping it under the worn cloth. "Any news on the spy?"

Alonzo glared at Tugger.

Teazer, remembering something, piped up: "Oh yeah, I forgot to mention: Mungojerrie's been captured. I think they've been torturing him for information."

"Torturing?" Admetus choked out, before bursting into laughter. Teazer flushed, but then saw the hilarity of the situation and joined in.

"Jerrie was captured _after_ the spy was discovered." Plato's smile was cool. "By the way, where're Pounce and Tumble?"

"Lost and frozen dead, I imagine," Alonzo rolled his eyes. "Serve them right. They were supposed to be protecting the home base! Probably snuck out to make time with Electra and Etcetera."

Plato took this explanation with a raised eyebrow, then settled in to wait for the morrow. The Final Battle of the Snowball War was about to begin.

"Alonzo?"

Alonzo glanced over at Plato. "Yes?"

"What would you do to a spy?"

"Kill him." It was clear Alonzo had no qualms about the identity of the queen's spy, as evidenced by his death glare towards the Maine Coon on the opposite side of the den.

Plato mused to himself. "Kill 'em…"

* * *

**A/N: Dun dun dun! Yes; I know I'm a jerk.  
**


End file.
